Live With Intention

Mama's Wings

2011-02-23T11:14:00.001-08:00

n my quiet time the other day, I was reading a little book called Today is Your Best Day by Roy Lessin. He was talking about how God uses the term "wings" as a way of demonstrating his presence, protection, covering, and strength. I was struck by the similarities to how we feel about our mama wings. The summer after my divorce, when my oldest two were going off to college and my youngest and I were moving to another state, I convinced them to give me a week - just us - no schedule, phones, friends, or distractions. I am pretty sure I said something like, "I need my chicks about me, under my wings, before we all scatter." I am using some of Mr. Lessin's word pictures - they are lovely and as moms we are an extension of God's love to our kids.

We use our wings to shield and provide relief. We can't hide them from every trial (nor would we want to) but we can be a buffer and a safe haven for them to come home to when we open our wings.

Our wings pull our kids close to our heart and into our care. When they are close we can hear their cry, get in touch with their need, and feel their heartbeat. It is there that we are close enough to whisper to each other. Just this afternoon I was snuggling my 1 year old grandson. As he closed his eyes I whispered, "Your grandma is utterly, wildly, crazy, head-over-heels in love with you." He didn't open his eyes, but he smiled around his pacifier.

Read the rest of the article and post your memories of your own Mama's wings and how you protect, cover and strengthen your chicks.
Blessings,
Beth

Yes to Stress - NO to DIStress

2011-02-07T16:33:00.001-08:00

We’ve all heard the term “stress management”. Stress comes from many sources and takes many forms and it DOES impact us. No matter how organized, flexible, or laid back we are, sooner or later we get stressed. Life happens - but we can learn some effective ways to cope with the stressors in our lives.

Stress is both good and bad. Good stress can excite and motivate us. It keeps us engaged in the world. We know we get bored when stress levels are too low and nothing much is required of us. A task or an event can cause some anxiety, that jumpy feeling in our stomach, and keep us awake at night – but it can also sharpen our thinking and boost our energy. We get fired up! We love the challenge!

The bad stress is the kind that causes distress and includes three components: the things that cause distress, like danger or illness; the internal negative feelings, such as worry, anger, depression; and the physical or biological changes, including increased heart and respiration rates, headaches, or stomach upset. When stress levels are too high for too long it becomes distress and emotional and physical damage begins to occur. Our goal is to find the right level of energizing stress and avoid disabling distress. A place to begin is to see distress as a signal to change our thinking or behavior – to realize that our responses are not serving us.

Have you heard the phrase “Change your thinking, change your life”? It contains much truth. No circumstance or event has meaning until we make an interpretation and attach meaning. Stress does not exist outside of you. It happens inside your mind and body and you are completely in charge of your stress level. We can’t choose our circumstances, but we can choose our response to them and prevent becoming distressed. Remember, circumstances change and this, too, shall pass.

We will talk more about stress next week. In the meantime ask yourself:
- What perceptions/interpretations do I have that increase stress levels?
- Where do I experience distress in my body?
- What negative coping mechanisms do I use?

Try experimenting with your self talk. Instead of saying, “When ________ happens I get furious!” try saying, “When _________ happens I feel mildly annoyed.” Notice what happens inside yourself when you change the level of stress with your language. Observe your responses this week and let me know what happens.

If you are experiencing distress and feel overwhelmed, call or e-mail. Let’s talk about it. Check out the website for more information and a free Stress Assessment

TAKE THE STAGE!

2011-02-02T16:42:00.000-08:00

Some of life's very best gifts come to us in the midst of the most difficult circumstances. My divorce, which was on my list of the worst things that could happen, created the space and opportunity for me to examine myself and to learn and grow in amazing ways. It will forever be a great sadness and loss in my life AND one of the finest blessings of my life. Aren't trials and challenges often like that? And do you notice how the things that we are sure are the worst possible - when they happen - are not as bad as we had imagined? The fear of the thing is worse than the reality of the thing.

I once read a story about the brilliant Italian violinist, Paganini. One evening, as he stepped on stage to thunderous applause, he realized there was something wrong with his violin. At first he thought it was just not his best instrument, but soon discovered it was not his at all. He was frozen for a moment, then turned to the audience and told them there had been a mistake and he did not have the right violin. He quickly went back stage and his worst fears were affirmed. His violin had been taken and the one he held in his hands, a significantly inferior instrument, had been left in its place.
Paganini dropped his head and closed his eyes. After a moment of silence he returned to the stage. "Ladies and gentlemen", he said, "I will now demonstrate to you that the music is not in the instrument but in the soul." What flowed from that violin, via Paganini's soul, held the audience captive in its depth and beauty. It was later reported that it had been one of his finest performances.

What music is filling your soul? What longing floats to the surface, gets stuck, then floats back down to remain unsettled for another day? What fear keeps you from stepping out in faith and confidence?

I am fairly certain that if I had been in Paganini's situation; renowned as one of the most accomplished violinists in the world, expected to perform as such, without my beloved and familiar instrument, shocked and furious that mine had been stolen (an extremely expensive one at that) - I would not have responded as he did. I would not have risen to the occasion with one of the best performances of my life. As I write that, I also am fairly certain that I could have. There IS music in my soul. I AM a woman of strength. I CAN visualize myself feeling the fear and doing it anyway. I can SENSE a stellar outcome. Can't you too? Don't you KNOW, somewhere deep inside, that you are MEANT to?

My invitation to you, and to myself, is to stop and take a deep breath, find that centered place of trust and courage, of faith and confidence and step onto the stage. TAKE THE STAGE knowing that your circumstances are meaningless. They don't define or confine you. They are present to grow you. They are here now to draw you higher. Don't stop. Beauty and God's glory lay waiting in your soul. Take the stage and let your music flow.

Blessings,
Beth
p.s. It is my honor and privilege to coach you to that place where your soul lets loose the melody it is holding.
Go to the website and click on the Packages tab to discover how you can
ENERGIZE ENRICH EMPOWER EXCEL

Nurture Your Children Without Starving Your Soul

2010-06-23T13:47:00.000-07:00

IT'S NOT TOO LATE! GET IN ON THIS MOMS!

You can only give out what you have within.
Invest in yourself. Build your energy reserves.
De-clutter some stuff - inside and out. Become a
powerhouse of focus and clarity.

4 week e-course. You don't even have to comb your hair!
Stay at home or hang at your favorite coffee shop. We come to YOU!
It's all via your e-mail inbox and a private online coaching journal.

www.nurtureyourchildren.com for lots of information and to register

Blessings and power to you,
Beth and Dr. Ron
p.s. you can bring a friend for FR*EE!

STUCK

2010-06-23T13:44:00.000-07:00

You know the sensation when you take a pill and it feels as if it is stuck somewhere between your throat and your stomach? Even hours later you are sure it is still lodged there, painful and unmoving.

You know how it feels when words get stuck in that unspoken, limbo place? Sometimes it is the great comeback you think of hours later, and so strongly wish you would have said. (These are generally sarcastic which is never appropriate or helpful - but I digress. More on that another day.) Maybe it is the thing you long to say but are afraid of "rocking the boat" or "upsetting the apple cart". (Think about those metaphors for speaking what is on your mind and heart - but, again, I digress.) Is it the truth you are fairly screaming inside, but don't have the courage to utter out loud? Do you sometimes feel as if you have lost your voice; as if no one will listen or care?

Read the rest of the article and come back and post your thoughts and experiences!
Blessings,
Beth

TRAPPED...

2010-06-16T21:18:00.000-07:00

Things are so often not what they seem. We all need reminders to look deeply. To listen beneath. To pay exquisite close attention.

I have seen this video 3 times. I cannot remember when I have been so moved or so convicted. I have been the kind of person this young woman describes and my heart is broken over it.

Take 4 minutes to listen to Koren's story. It will rock your world. You will be changed. We have been talking about the giftedness and genius in each of us. She shows us the absolute and amazing TRUTH of that.

We must let each other out of the BOX. We must stop looking at anyone with a set of expectations - and begin looking through eyes that anticipate greatness, that are assured of beauty, that see the promise of surprise, and the limitless privilege of LOVE. We must let GOD out of the box too. Allow Him to show up however, whenever, and in whomever He will. Expect miracles. They are all around you.

Blessings,
Beth
p.s. To read more or donate to support more people like Koren go to:
www.younglife.org/Capernaum

Nurture Your Children Without Starving Your Soul

2010-06-11T18:00:00.000-07:00

DON'T MISS THIS WHATEVER YOU DO!

Nurture Your Children Without Starving Your Soul

What If You Could Banish Guilt and Exhaustion, Feel Confident and Energized, and Be a Stellar Mom?

You are 4 weeks away from the life you envision.
And You Get to Bring a Friend Along for FREE!

The Biggest Mistake Moms Ever Make in Their Parenting Is Putting Themselves At The Bottom of The List.

Announcing Beth Madigan and Dr. Ron's 4-Week e-Coaching Course:
Nurture Your Kids Without Starving Your Soul: The "Take Good Care of Yourself" System For Mothers of Young Children

Here's Exactly What You'll Learn During Our 4 Weekly e-Sessions Together...
And You Never Have to Get Dressed, Clean House, or Leave Home!

Week #1: CLEAR THE CLUTTER. In our first lesson we will clear up the stinkin' thinkin' of guilt and the distorted rationales for not making yourself a priority in your own life. We will also find and eliminate the one most maddening source of clutter in your world so you can Clear the time and energy to get the most from this eClass.

Week #2: ASSESS YOUR LIFE'S GTC'S. In our second lesson you will take a comprehensive look at your life and get personal coaching from us to discover your own most important GTC's (This has "Got To Change"). We will guide you in choosing the one or two areas of focus that you are most ready to change and that will bring you the biggest "bang for your buck".

Week #3: RELEASE YOUR RENEWABLE ENERGY SYSTEM. In our third lesson we will pinpoint and Reduce your Energy Drainers, Reuse or establish new Energy Gainers, and teach you how to Recycle the stress in your life so you are never again without Energy Reserves. The week will end with you having a personalized set of 7 Minute Solutions for managing your emotional, physical and spiritual health on a daily basis.

Week #4: ESTABLISH YOUR BUTTERFLY EFFECTS.You may have heard about the butterfly effect. "A butterfly flaps its wings in Brazil and sets off a tornado in Texas". The idea is that small changes at the start of an event can cause a chain of events that leads to enormous changes later on. You may not think that a 4 week eClass can lead to life enhancing changes that will make you healthier and happier for years to come. But, in our fourth lesson we will personally coach you to uncover the small, doable actions steps that are the keys to unlock vibrant health, positive emotions and sustainable joy in your life.

As you can see, we've got this special e-coaching program all setup to get you results by the time we're finished. And with our personal attention (literally, one-on-one interaction between us!) this entire course will be custom-tailored for your specific needs.

We're gonna cover it all...
Learn to respond to any situation with calm and assurance

Specific ideas on how to build emotional, physical and spiritual energy reserves

How to identify and eliminate obstacles in your way

A customized plan of action for sustainable change

Discover the secret of letting go of guilt and blame

Discover and live from your most deeply held values

Tips to incorporate the "whole" of you into every day - mind, body & spirit

In just 4 weeks you will become a channel of powerful, positive energy

Move through your world with more joy and passion

Identify the areas of your life you are most motivated to change

Identify your strengths, positive qualities, and health promoting behaviors

Access tools and resources to help you reach your goals

Develop a plan of small, incremental steps that will create a track record of positive success and build your confidence in creating the lifestyle change you desire

As if that weren't enough...
there are 4 GREAT bonuses with this course!

CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION AND REGISTRATION
MARK YOUR CALENDARS FOR JULY 5,12, 19, & 26

No Losers!

2010-06-11T17:58:00.001-07:00

Have I told you all lately how much I appreciate you and how much my life expands because of you? Here is yet another example of your insight, brilliance, and strength. This week one of my clients was processing a protracted and unpleasant court experience with her ex-husband. Through tears, she reported that she had "won" but it sure didn't feel like a win.

When I asked her what a win would look and feel like, she was quiet for a long time. She realized that underlying the whole process was the expectation of an outcome in which another person would think and behave in a certain way - that a person would change. She clearly understood how futile that expectation was and that it wasn't even what she truly wanted. She was able to see that two people can have a shared experience (marriage and raising kids) and have very different perspectives of that experience. She had allowed the vast difference in perspective to bring anger, frustration, and confusion along with worry, stress, and blame.

She recognized a component of her own emotional history. If I "win" then I must have done something wrong - was a shadowy message that beat underneath it all. Think for a moment of your own embedded thoughts and past experiences of winning. What comes up for you? Do you want to jump up with a victorious fist in the air, or do you feel like shrinking into the background? Is the concept of winning accompanied by thoughts or feelings of losing? How do feelings of right and wrong mesh with winning and losing?

At this point in our exploration her voice softened and gained strength and confidence. A win, she said, means a truth is revealed. There is a knowing what is right, and that you have discovered something central to who you are and who the other person is. What she wanted, and what would have constituted a win with her ex-husband, was to make amends, to find common ground to operate from going forward, to reach agreement, and to communicate in a way that each could understand and invest in. A win shows you where your thinking and behavior need adjustment - no matter how difficult the revelation may be. "Being who I am, sharing myself and what is true from my heart, is all I can do. And allowing others to be who they are. It is NOT competitive, never I win and You lose. I don't want any "losers" in my life - ever."

Beautiful! What would your life and relationships be like if there were never any "losers"? If no one ever went away from you feeling less than, criticized, or hurt? Does this ever happen with a spouse, child, relative, colleague, or employee? What can you do this week to turn the situation into a win?

Stubborn Fat?

2010-06-11T17:55:00.000-07:00

Have you heard about HCG for weight loss? HCG in small quantities mobilizes the body's stored fat. When combined with a special anti-inflammatory diet, stored fat is easily broken down and eliminated by the body. This allows for fast weight loss while maintaining lean body mass.

HCG also acts to restore your bodies "set point." The hypothalamus is a gland in the brain that controls the metabolic rate of the body. Similar to the set point of a thermostat controlling the temperature, the hypothalamus regulates the amount of fat needed for storage in order for you to survive. HCG has the unique ability to increase your metabolic rate by resetting your "set point." This facilitates a permanent change in metabolic rate and encourages fast and permanent weight loss.

Sound good? I thought so and sought the medical expertise of Dr. Dave Hagen NMD at Focus For Life in Scottsdale. I am the classic case of post menopausal stubborn belly fat. I am happy to announce that Dr. Dave's protocol, including HCG, is finally having a POSITIVE effect and the scales and belly are heading downward!
Click the link below for information. To your health!
Focus for Life

Gotta 'Fess Up

2010-05-27T07:50:00.000-07:00

Don't you just love it/hate it when God, the Universe, and your conscience conspire to move you to do the right thing?

After writing to you about how agile and determined our minds are when we want to rationalize our less than upright behavior, I had an incident where I did just that. It has niggled at me for a couple of days , despite my rationalizing that it was not such a big deal. As I was coming to the realization that I would not be at peace until I made it right, I came across this:

"Adam Clarke was an assistant in a dry goods store, selling silks and satins to a cultured clientele. One day, his employer suggested to him that he try stretching the silk as he measured it out. This would increase his profits, and also increase his value to the company. Young Clarke straightened up from his work, faced his boss courageously, and said, "Sir, your silk may stretch, but my conscience will not."

Unfortunately, some of us are not so honest (ouch!) The book The Day America Told the Truth reported the following: 91% of those surveyed admitted to lying about something on a regular basis; 50% procrastinated, in effect doing nothing, one full day out of every five; and 74% steal from those who will not miss it. Examples of such stealing include taking office supplies from work, long lunches, extravagant meals, accepting gifts from customers, ignoring copyright laws (how about burning CD's and DVD's?), claiming improper deductions, etc. But the person of integrity avoids all such temptations. "
(from A Dad's Blessing by Gary Smalley and John Trent

The next afternoon I got this from my (unknowing) daughter in the text of an e-mail about doing the right thing:

Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

I don't know who wrote that, but it resonates completely in my heart. Yes, I have set things to rights as best I could. I received love and understanding in return. Whew! That was a lot of internal drama I could have avoided.

Where in your life have you been less than honest?
What is your conscience telling you to do about it?
Will you follow through?

GET OFF YOUR BUT

2010-05-11T20:46:00.001-07:00

I read a quote once that said something like, (I’m paraphrasing) “The human mind is never more agile or quick than when it is engaged in rationalization.” So true, and I would add, when it is making excuses.

Have you said or thought any of these?
- “I’ve tried to change, but this is just the way I am.”
- “I would say something, but I might sound stupid.”
- “I would like to, but I’m too old/fat/clumsy/young/slow/_______.”
- “I would go, but he/she/they would get mad/sad/annoyed/_______.”
- “I want _________, but __________.”
- “I would share my feelings, but I am uncomfortable/ would cry/ feel foolish.”
- “I think about telling ________ the truth, but I am afraid ____________.”
- “I would get up and exercise before work, but I am not a morning person.”

We want our world to make sense so we rationalize our behavior and make excuses. We analyze ourselves and try to figure out “why” we operate or think the way we do. We are the sum of all our experiences and no two of us have the same set of variables. At the end of the day – or sadly for many, at the end of our lives – we didn’t figure it out and we didn’t change or live the way we wanted to.

Read the rest of the article here and come back and share your thoughts and insights1

Strength in Weakness

2010-05-02T22:22:00.000-07:00

"When the heart weeps for what it has lost,
The spirit laughs for what it has found." - Unknown -

When we are weak and grieving a loss, it can
become a great strength if we will allow it.
There is POWER in our challenges and trials.
Scripture tells us it "...will yield the peaceful
fruit of righteousness". We will all
suffer in this life. It is God's training ground
and the purpose is to grow us. Look inside. See
what has been found - and laugh in joy and gratitude.

The Joy of Acceptance

2010-04-29T22:27:00.001-07:00

This morning I got a coupon from Borders and paused to watch a video interview with Michael J. Fox about his new book A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Future… Watch the video here.

He writes to graduates with suggestions for a richer life. I have always enjoyed and admired this man as an actor, but who he has become on his journey with Parkinson’s Disease is a crowning achievement and a testament to the power of attitude and acceptance in transforming a life.

Michael didn’t finish high school, pursuing his acting career from the age of 15. Years later, the father of four found himself helping with high school homework and college applications. He wondered how he was able to do this. What constitutes an education? How do you get one? How did he fill in gaps? In his own words, “I might have skipped class, but I didn’t miss any lessons.” Herein lies the secret to his great success. Read on and allow Michael J. Fox to school you today.

When he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease he had to reconsider everything. He describes that time as a “little death”. Through much soul searching and the help of trusted family and friends he came to see his illness as a new second take on life, a rebirth that could only come from acceptance.

“My happiness grows in direct proportion to my acceptance,
and in inverse proportion to my expectations.” -Michael J. Fox-

I ask my coaching clients to complete a session prep form before each call. After asking them to list their current challenges I encourage them to reframe the challenge with this, “The situation has arisen precisely to move you to shift your viewpoint. Take the current facts and view this challenge from an angle that uplifts and empowers you. How is this also good?” Changing our perspective and consciously looking for the blessing changes everything about the way we deal with life.

I had this very conversation just yesterday with a client. She had become so frustrated and disappointed with her relationships that she was beginning to think she was kind of crazy. Not only did she have expectations about how others should act or respond, she felt responsible when things didn’t go that way; as if she must have said or done something to mess things up.

Michael brilliantly admonishes us to be “scrupulously honest” about what is. Stay in reality. Check in with the truth of who we ARE, not who we think we are or who we would like to be. I would add, ask yourself, “What is my responsibility in this situation? Keep drilling down to the truth of what is, then let the rest go and move through your day in peace.

The interviewer asked Michael what advice he would give to Alex P. Keaton and Marty McFly (two of his most famous characters).He responded that he would remind Alex that life is not linear. Expect and enjoy the twists and turns of the journey and don’t take yourself so seriously.

His advice to Marty (a character he loves) is to just hang on! Marty is so open and willing to grab life with both arms wide open, Michael says hang on and enjoy!

Thanks, Michael. I hope we have your wisdom and humor for years to come.

Share your stories of acceptance of what is. How did you find the joy? What did you draw on to reframe your situation?

You Decide!

2010-04-06T15:05:00.000-07:00

The circumstances and events of our lives have no meaning in themselves. They become sad, joyous, tragic, puzzling, delightful, etc. only when we make an interpretation and attach meaning to them. Since life is all about how we interpret it - interpret in your favor!

If you're experiencing circumstances that have got you down, try reframing. To reframe, take the facts of your circumstance and adjust for a different viewpoint. Shift your attitude. There is great opportunity here to begin thinking in ways that will empower you and give you peace. How is this also good? Find the blessing in the challenge.

If you got a really bad haircut, use this opportunity to focus on your INNER beauty - and that of others too, rather than on appearances. Share observations and compliments about the other person's CHARACTER.

If you have lost your job, use this opportunity to comtemplate how much is enough. Where can you minimize your spending? How much emphasis do you put on your LIFESTYLE vs. your LIFE? What unique skills might you bring to the forefront? What doors are opening as this one closes?

Practice reframing. Start with something small. Choose a circumstnace that is unsettling or annoying and interpret it from another point of view - a positive, uplifting perspective! When life brings you lemons - add some sugar!

Why Your LIfe Won't Cooperate

2010-04-01T01:22:00.001-07:00

I’m hearing frustration and discouragement from folks these days. We have just ended the first quarter of 2010 – the year of God’s Perfect Divine Order, a year of wholeness and power in which there is no lack or want. Yet, for many of you this year is looking pretty much like last year. You are struggling with the same issues and having the same thoughts and conversations. And it’s not for lack of good intentions or real desire to step up. You’ve read the books and know what to do. So what’s the deal? Why won’t your life cooperate?

If I asked you to list 10 things you would like to change or improve about yourself you could rattle them off pronto. If I asked you to list your ten most valuable strengths and abilities I’m guessing it would take a little longer and be much harder for you to do.

Sitting on your chair as you read this is one trillion cells (that’s a 1 with 14 0s behind it!) Your brain alone has 100 billion nerve cells – all “fearfully and wonderfully made” and programmed to contain and process more information than the entire internet. You are a GENIUS! It’s quite simple really. The reason your life won’t cooperate is that you have oodles of untapped genius.

Read the complete article and subscribe to the FREE newsletter here.
There is also a special offer to begin to discover and use your unique gifts and strengths.

What are you thinking about your own undeveloped genius?

2010-03-16T08:13:00.000-07:00

One of the finest things we can do for each other is to listen. One of my professors called it “paying exquisite close attention”. Most of us would say that we’re pretty good listeners – and that our friends are generally good listeners. They will stay quiet and be objective. Yet, sometimes – when we ONLY want them to listen, they will jump in to save us from distress, solve our problem, help us deal with strong emotions, or tell us about their own similar situation.

Listening is crucial to intimacy and safety and it is more than simply hearing what the other person is saying. Listening is an ACTION that has two components.

One is attention or awareness. It is listening with feeling and intuition. We listen for the words, the tone, the pace, the energy level – all the information that is being sent. Author and psychologist Larry Crabb refers to this as listening beneath. We listen for what is NOT being said in words, but is communicated through body language, emotion, and the meaning the person is attaching and the values and concerns being expressed.

The second aspect is what we DO with our listening – the impact we have when we ACT on our listening. Let’s take a look at that by examining two levels of listening.

To read about the levels and subscribe to the newsletter - it's FREE - click here.

Come back and tell us what you discovered when you used all your LEVEL II skills!

Life is DEEP and it is W I D E
emerge Explore EXPAND

Crash Through!

2010-02-17T20:02:00.001-08:00

Close your eyes for a moment and take a deep breath. Inventory your life. What do you wish you wouldn’t have quit on?

Is there a wall in front of you right now – today? Is there something or someone you are thinking you will just quit on?

Have you heard of Liz Murray? Lifetime did a movie about her called Homeless to Harvard. After a pretty hideous childhood and a homeless adolescence, she looked around her one day at the people passing by and thought, “No one around me has anymore than I do. I am gifted and able. What am I going to do with it?”
Take 3 minutes to hear her remarkable story here:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZSXHjXgA

Endurance feeds and sustains every other great attribute in your life. If you have vision, courage, desire, a great work ethic, honesty, integrity, and determination, they will all be lifted to higher levels if you apply perseverance.

You have heard of Winston Churchill’s famous encouragement and admonishment to “Never, never, never, never, never give up!” If it is important you gotta fight for it! Endure. Persevere. Press on!

How? By learning and disciplining yourself to crash through quitting points. We all have them. They may be professional, personal or moral, or points in our relationships. If you quit a job in anger the result is unemployment, an unsatisfactory referral, and demeaning or rationalized thoughts about our own behavior. If you leave a marriage in pain or frustration, the result is heartache, kids without a parent in their home, and loss and loneliness. Over time we become dejected and defeated people.

It’s also true that just because you get to a stopping point, you don’t have to stop. You can keep going. If your goal is to run 2 miles, you don’t have to stop when you get there. Keep running! If your boss asks for one really innovative idea, come up with 2 or 3. Keep going! January 1 I committed to no sugar(particularly chocolate) for 21 days. When I got there I kept going and got to 27 – and you know what? I quit just because I had gone “long enough” and more than I set out to do. There was no reason to quit and lots of good health and self-discipline reasons to persevere. Do you own the weapon of perseverance in your arsenal? If you are a person of faith, employ it! With God all things are possible and nothing is impossible.

Look again at the inventory you took and ask yourself, “What has quitting cost me?”
Now close your eyes again and visualize that wall in front of you. You are standing in front of it with your hard hat, goggles, and a massive sledge hammer. Go at it and don’t quit until you have crashed through!

I would be honored to bang away with you and coach you to a crash through! Call 602.626.8036 or e-mail beth.madigan@cox.net to begin TODAY!

Blessings,
Beth

Develop Selective Memory

2010-01-27T23:56:00.000-08:00

Think for a moment about your favorite memory – something lovely, sweet, exciting, fun, romantic, breathtaking, surprising, giddy, or uplifting. Ahh! It’s so wonderful to linger there isn’t it? Go ahead and stay awhile….

Now shift gears. Remember something that is yucky – definitely NOT a favorite. Perhaps it is hurtful, embarrassing, fearful, unjust, helpless, or devastating. What do you notice about the two experiences? Be specific – really observe inside of you.

Isn’t it fascinating how a memory can take you to soaring heights or plunge you into the depths? How does that happen? It happens when you decide how an event, a conversation, or a circumstance is going to live in your memory. We can “program” our hearts and minds. We have the power of choice in what we recall, and how. Please hear me out here. I am not dismissing difficult or horrific events, nor am I advocating a pie-in-the-sky, rose -colored glasses, denial mind set. What I am suggesting is that we can choose to remember what is good about an event, person, or circumstance – rather than what is hurtful and what takes us to those depths of anger, disappointment, and discouragement.

What person, event, or circumstance had you spiraling down into the depths?

Develop selective memory. Right now, today, you have the power to remember yourself to victory and happiness. Make a list of great selective memory words and post them where you can see them often. Words like joy, learning, grateful, hope, fun, love, adventure, contentment, power and choice. Remember that thoughts of gratitude and appreciation are the only ones that can combat thoughts of anger and discouragement. Decide. Choose. Remember.

Speaking of remember – remember that favorite memory we started with? You can call it up anytime you want. Go ahead and linger there awhile.
Read the entire article here, then come back and post your thoughts.
Beth

JOURNAL WORKSHOP

2010-01-27T23:50:00.000-08:00

Have you been thinking about journaling? Would you like to be a more consistent journaler? Do you get stuck when you start to write? Come fire your imagination and creativity. Take a mini sabbatical and
see what magical things can come in just 90 minutes of uninterrupted time for YOU.

Thursday March 4
8:30- 10:00 pm EST

In this workshop you will:
- Discover the benefits and power of journaling. Did you know it reduces stress?
- Get quiet and still. Quiet the monkey mind chatter, Ahhhh!
- Engage in a meditation to prepare you to write. Just let your mind drift -
no agenda or time constraints
- Learn a wonderful technique for discovering what's most important to explore
and write about.
- Do some journaling!
- Get a worksheet and suggestions to keep you going
We will take our mini sabbatical via telephone. If you have not done this before no worries - it is easy and fun. You can curl up in your favorite quiet spot with your journal, a cup of tea, and you can do it in your sweats or jammies!
The cost is $20.00
There are a limited number of spaces on the bridge line so call 602.626.8036 or e-mail beth.madigan@cox.net today to reserve your space.

"I want to write but more than that
I want to bring out all kinds of things
that lie buried in my heart."
- Anne Frank -

More of Success

2010-01-15T09:39:00.001-08:00

If I have been of service, if I have glimpsed more of the nature and essence of ultimate good,
if I am inspired to reach wider horizons of thought and action, if I am at peace with myself,
it has been a successful day. -Alex Noble-

Choose any aspect of this definition of a successful day and give it a GO!
Let us know about your results.

More of

2010-01-15T09:39:00.000-08:00

How Would You Define It?

2010-01-13T23:43:00.001-08:00

I've been thinking about what constitutes success. In his book 101Best Ways to Get Ahead, author Michael Angier asked the likes of Bill Gates, Tony Blair, the Dalai Lama, and Lance Armstrong (and 97 others) this question, "What advice would you give a son, daughter, or grandchild? Based upon your knowledge and experience, what would you share with them that would be most helpful to them getting along and getting ahead in the world?" I believe the answer lies largely in how you define success.

You can read the entire article at www.livwithintention.org/mother.htm

What would your answer to the question be?

The "End" of Giving

2010-01-07T07:49:00.001-08:00

Below is the final chapter of one reader’s 25 Days of Giving. I resonated with several of her insights and have commented at the end of each one. What comes up for you?

“First I learned that I get overwhelmed and stifled pretty easily. I am notorious for making excuses and talking myself out of action. What these last 25 days have shown me is that all I have to do is put one foot in front of the other. I have always envisioned a grand entrance into volunteering...when I have the time. I tell myself that when my kids are older, I will certainly give much more. Truth is I don't have to wait and my family doesn't have to suffer because of my desire to do for others. One small gesture can have a lasting ripple affect. A simple smile can change the course of a person's day. If that is all I have to give, it is more than enough.”

I have thought about the things that “take me out of action”. What is it for you? Have you heard of the Butterfly Effect? A butterfly flapping its wings in Brazil can create a hurricane in Texas. The idea is that small changes at the start of an event can start a chain of events that lead to enormous changes later on. Perseverance is a most valuable trait. Small acts are very important. Start now. Give what you have. No gift is too small or insignificant.

“I also learned that opening my heart to the needs of others changed the energy I present to the world. I typically have a very closed energy. I go about my business and truthfully avoid interaction with strangers. I'm sure much of that comes from childhood. I had a few scary stranger run-ins which created a tough exterior. Now that I am an adult, I can let down that guard and let people in, even if only for a minute or two. The other night I was at the Hobby Lobby and the girl in front of me just started talking to me. She obviously had things on her mind. She opened the conversation by telling me that she was exhausted and her trip was only half over. I had no idea what she was talking about but I asked her about it and she vented a little. Before now, that just wouldn't have happened”.

Love and compassion involve risk. Since everything in the world is about the nature and quality of our relationships, it’s a risk worth taking! If you want to heighten your intuition and awareness, brighten your day and someone else’s, and change the energy in the world, get outside yourself and pour into someone else.

“I learned that my kids really are sponges. They look to us for guidance on how to live their lives. When we feed them good food, their bodies thrive. When we feed them good information, their spirits and minds thrive. We have the power to instill so much. It takes a conscious effort but it is so worth it!”

Beautifully said. Kids are watching and listening. The most powerful tool we have is modeling the attitudes, beliefs and behaviors we want to instill. They are hungry for our time and attention and will rise (or fall) to our expectations. Carry on moms, dads, uncles and aunties, grandparents, teachers, coaches, neighbors, and friends of young people!

“I learned that I like discipline. It has always been a struggle for me. Many times I have wanted to blog everyday or exercise everyday but I always fall off the wagon. This is the first time in a long time that I put my mind to something and saw it through everyday for 25 days. I loved it! I loved the feeling of accomplishment and the way it changed me. You do have to do something consistently for a long period of time to see a change. And a change I have seen.”

Ah. The “D” word. The truth is, we all like it – and we need it. Where would you like to practice discipline this year in your life? When we fail to reach our goals it is rarely because of poor planning or inability. It is lack of commitment and follow-through. Set your sights and keep moving. Anaias Nin said, ”Be not afraid of moving slowly. Be afraid only of standing still.” Celebrate every small step and keep moving in the direction you wish to go. Get coaching support along the way!

“Most importantly I learned that one person truly can make a difference. I have been skeptical of that for a long time. One of the ways that I have talked myself out of acting is that if it's not big enough, it won't matter. So not true. In the small gestures we made, I could see a huge effect.”

I hear the sound of butterfly wings…

I will continue this habit, maybe not on a daily basis, but it is a part of me now. I am grateful for the experience and I look forward to committing to another 25 days. The catalyst for this was Christmas but it is an invaluable exercise any time of year!”

What a wonderful habit to make a part of who you are! Hearts and lives will be changed forever in ways you may never know but can feel and celebrate. I am inspired! I will be a volunteer mentor for women coming out of Human Trafficking and am on day number 4 of no sugar.

Share your thoughts, inspirations, and commitments! Together, one small act at a time, we CAN change the world.

“A small group of thoughtful people could change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.“ Margaret Mead

Blessings,
Beth

Old-fashioned Values

2010-01-06T14:46:00.000-08:00

My mom sent me this clip and it brought me to tears. It is my wish for each family and each one of our kids. Enjoy!

Ten as a Triangular Number

2010-01-01T04:23:00.000-08:00

In the post below I talked about the significance of the number ten. Here is another facet for those of you who enjoy these studies as much as I do.
Triangular numbers are those that can be represented by an equilatersl triangle.
These won't publish the way I print them, but you get the idea if you think bowling pins.

For instance, the number 3 is the first triangular number:
0
0 0

The number 10 is the first triangular number that has a center:
0
0 0
0 0 0
0 0 0 0
0 0 0 0 0
It is the only triangular number in which the center is half the total number - pretty amazing.

The year 2010 holds great promise. Expect Amazing Things!

Start by Slowing Down

2010-01-01T04:20:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year! Here we are again – shocked that another year has passed so quickly and looking forward with great anticipation to the new year ahead. Beginnings are so exciting! They signal the end of something and the chance to reevaluate, make changes, create a new plan, and begin with a clean slate.

It is the wee hours of the first day of 2010 as I write this. I have been outside wrapped in a blanket listening, thinking, dozing, being grateful. There is a full moon tonight with a huge white ring around it. It is also a Blue Moon which only happens every 2.7 years I have read; historically rare on December 31. Nature is my primary spiritual pathway. I would rather be outside than inside almost anytime so I notice and revel in these things. My relationship with God is my anchor and filter and I hear His voice most clearly in the quiet and beauty of creation. From that perspective, I’ve been reading about the number 10. It is the start of a whole new order of numbers and the culmination of the numbers that come before it. That is significant as we embark not just upon a new year, but a new decade, having just completed the first decade of a new century. Ten denotes perfect divine order through time and coming full circle. In this completion there is no lack or want.

Wow! Does that give you goosebumps and get you fired up to see what 2010 has in store? What do you need to see your vision HAPPEN this year?

A couple weeks ago I shared one reader’s commitment to 25 Days of Giving. Day 20 held blessing and power that I believe we could all use in the early days of 2010.

“This is a tough one. Probably the hardest I have yet to do. Day 20 I gave to myself. I gave myself forgiveness and compassion. I spent the day making Christmas gifts and never left the house. I thought about running to the computer to find something that I could quickly give money to but then decided that it was ok that I didn't get out into the world that day. I will certainly make up for it because I want to but I gave myself permission to fall down. For it is in the many reminders that I am not perfect that I find peace and contentment. It is my imperfections that make me human and make me, me. I am notoriously hard on myself and would ordinarily beat myself up for days. Or I would have thrown money at something to cover up my mistake. Not this time. I am proud of day 20. To me, it is a critical form of giving. Giving kindness, forgiveness and understanding to ourselves is a huge part of this process. Now back to giving to others!”

Extending grace and compassion to yourself is crucial to gaining clarity and direction. Stepping out of the world and your daily routine will create space and time for new ideas and real listening. Notice how she had to consciously deny the urge to get “busy”, do something, give money.

Start by slowing down. Allow yourself, in the next few days, an hour or two with absolutely no agenda. Don’t DO, just BE. Take a walk, curl up in your favorite chair, daydream, lie in a hot bath…

Then get out your journal and record whatever you heard or observed in your quiet time. Here are a couple reflection questions as you set out on the marvelous journey into 2010.

What was your greatest accomplishment in 2009? Was there a problem or challenge you tackled or overcame? Celebrate it!

What is your greatest challenge right now?

What area of your life will you focus on this year?

What do you need?

Who will you enlist to help, encourage, and support you?

I am grateful for what each of you brought to my life and work in 2009 and I am honored to go with you into 2010. As always, I am ready to support and coach you as you explore your vision and purpose.

Blessings,
Beth

Everybody's Fine

2009-12-15T21:58:00.000-08:00

I saw the movie Everybody's Fine this weekend. Robert DeNiro is a recent widower, named Frank, who has four adult children and one grandson. He is retired after decades of applying protective coating to thousands of miles of telephone wire. Last week we talked about paradox and dichotomy. Let's add irony. This man who is very aware, and proud of, having helped billions of conversations to be carried through his wires, has avoided important conversations his entire life.

After his kids back out of a family visit at the last minute, he decides to surprise each one by going to them. Frank waits hours outside his son's apartment in N.Y. but he neither shows up nor answers the phone. Saddened, but determined, Frank boards a train for Chicago. His daughter is on edge at seeing him and there is a miserable dinner where his son-in-law and grandson are overtly at odds. He spends a little time talking and playing golf with his grandson and begins to understand that he has been cut significantly out of the loop in his family's lives. He is hustled off to Denver after only one night, with the lament of, "Oh dad, any week but this one." In Denver he begins to understand that his children are both intimidated by him and afraid of disappointing him; so they have pretended and dodged for a long time. His wife ran interference, protecting the kids by keeping things from him that would make him angry and be too hard on them, and protecting him by censoring information so he wouldn't worry or become angry. In Las Vegas he overhears a phone message that lets him know his daughter is lying to him about her circumstances. Tired and dejected he suffers a heart attack on the plane home.

While in and out of consciousness Frank gains clarity , realizing the truth of his relationships. He and his kids genuinely love and care for each other but the intimacy level is flatlined - just like his heart. He finally gets his kids in a room together, at unbearable cost. A horrible truth is revealed opening the door to intimacy and healing.

In this family a universal truth holds. No matter how difficult or painful; no matter how your heart pounds and your hands get clammy; no matter how much you DO NOT want to broach the subject; no matter how the other person might respond...It is ALWAYS best to have an honest conversation. It is ALWAYS good to speak the truth in LOVE. It is ALWAYS right to build honesty and intimacy into our relationships. I have never seen it fail. It is how we were meant to live.

This season, as you gather with family and friends, remember this universal truth. If something is broken, fix it. Write a letter. Take someone to see this movie - then begin an honest conversation. Make the phone call. Take the initiative. Go deep. Let the people that matter to you know how much they matter to you. Commit to begin 2010 with a clear, light heart and sound relationships. Then relax into genuine enjoyment and watch your world change!

Blessings to you,
Beth

Energize Your New Year

2009-12-15T21:52:00.000-08:00

As each year closes it is good to take stock, then spend some time thinking about the new year ahead and how you would like it to take shape. I love a bright, clean page in my journal - a symbol of limitless possibilities to be recorded on a blank slate. No matter WHAT transpired in the year gone by, the future is shiny and new! The world is wide open!

To help me focus my thinking and energy I decide on a word, a theme, and a goal for the year.
2009 was the Year of Convergence.
WORD: Adventure
THEME: Walk with God
GOAL: (From the Hebrew word Yada) to know; to understand; to learn; to experience; to discern; to be willing; to be skillful; to be wise; to cause to know; to obey

I will be putting some quiet meditation into this exercise over the next couple weeks. I invite and encourage you to give it a go. Share your Word, Theme, and Goal for 2010. Anything and ALL things are POSSIBLE! Name it!
And Share it with us so we can all be fired up to jump into our new year!

Blessings,
Beth

25 Days of Giving

2009-12-09T23:21:00.001-08:00

I am often touched and inspired by the thoughts and actions of all of you. Thank you for sharing yourselves with me and allowing me to pass on your wisdom, compassion, and profound thinking. This is from someone very dear to me and a loyal reader. May it get your compassionate and creative juices flowing!

“Every year around this time I feel a twinge in my heart. It's the feeling that I am abundantly blessed combined with the reminder that there are so many people hurting and doing without. Those who are blessed, go out and be a blessing. That is what I would like to do. I have always believed that it is my job as a mother to teach my children to make the world a better place. What better way to do that than using our own 2 hands?

So this holiday season we are going to do our very best to give everyday until Christmas. That leaves us 25 days to give, give. give. The options really are endless. It can be small or rather large. I hope to try it all these next 25 days. I am posting this adventure here in hopes that it holds me accountable. How often do we have a desire to do something but lack the follow through? I do hope that you will keep me honest and moving forward.

They say that habits form in 21 days. Hopefully this exercise in looking beyond ourselves will become a habit. I'll be filling you in on our progress. And please join in if you feel so inclined. Don't feel overwhelmed by the 25 straight days thing. There are no rules with this, just give from your heart, once or a hundred times.. I trust that God will put our effort where it needs to be. Happy 25 days of giving!

We bought and delivered 2 bags full of baby food for the girls' preschool to distribute to babies in need. Woo hoo for day number 2!!
On a side note, I just have to mention that this exercise is really powerful. I panicked a bit after I hit the publish button yesterday. For a split second I wondered why I had committed to what felt like a huge feat. And if I fail I will be so disappointed in myself. And then...I remembered that I have to leave the Negative Nelly voice behind and step out in faith. I have to trust that my desire to make a difference and God's desire to have us make a difference is more than enough to get us through 25 days. Since that realization I find myself coming up with all kinds of new giving ideas. There is truly no shortage of options and most take no more than a few minutes to complete. I am grateful for this challenge and I am being transformed already.

I heard that our children are being referred to as "Generation Me". Ugh. I don't know about you but I sure don't want to contribute to "Generation Me"! I hope this exercise will have a lasting affect on my children. I hope we continue to find joy in giving long after these 25 days are over.”

Thus far this family has distributed blankets and bag lunches to homeless people, put a small surprise in the mailbox for their carrier, written notes and sent snacks to our brave soldiers, given grocery certificates, paid for the car behind them at McDonald’s, and left flowers on doorsteps. There are reports that unusual levels of kindness and thoughtfulness are happening betwixt siblings. I am told this mama is experiencing more joy, patience, and peace as she moves through her days. Dad has been seen performing random acts of kindness and offering suggestions for giving. An adult sister has joined in the fun and taken it to the streets in her own life.

See a need and fill it. Pass it on. If you have been blessed, be a blessing. If you have a need, allow someone to help you. It can also expand our hearts to receive. We are meant to do life together, to lift each other up, and to practice a “one another” mentality.

Give. Receive. Be blessed.
Beth

LOOK FOR IT

2009-11-23T18:36:00.000-08:00

Thursday we will gather in honor of Thanksgiving Day. It is a time to count our blessings and begin a season that is supposed to be filled with joy, peace, goodwill, fellowship, and fun. I think the reason the holidays are challenging for so many people is the dichotomy between what is “supposed” to transpire and the reality of stress and discouragement at this time of year.

I heard a report about five components of life. The middle three – Physical/Mental/Social/ - may rotate in order of importance or urgency; but the first one: Spiritual and the last one: Financial, must always maintain their order. I am inclined to agree. I know financial stressors are great and clamor for our attention. I am not minimizing the circumstances many of you find yourselves in. I also know that finding time for quiet meditation, prayer, or worship to nurture your spiritual relationship is easier to put off. The quiet whisper is drowned out by the clamor. To borrow a line from Oprah, here’s what I know for sure. Stressing, forcing, and striving are NOT helpful. They are harmful. God tells us to cease striving. Be still.

If I asked you to pick up a can of soup you could do it, right? What if I asked you to hold it for an hour? A day? A week? A month? A DECADE? Now imagine one in your other hand too. Maybe a couple in your purse or pocket. Do you see the cumulative effect of holding stressors over time? They are literal burdens that rob us of freedom, ease, comfort, peace, and joy (Do you hear the Christmas Carol in your head? Oh tidings of comfort and joy…)

This week listen for one full day and notice the number of complaints and discouraging words you hear. Notice the number of positive attitudes and expressions of gratitude you hear. How many of each came from YOUR mouth?

Go ahead and make your list of gratitudes. Keep first things first and take some time – even 5-10 minutes - to make your spiritual relationship your top priority. Let someone know how grateful you are for them and why you appreciate them (be specific). Do something great for your body. Hang out with someone you truly enjoy. Challenge your mind with something that engages you.

A man’s small plane went down on a remote island. After weeks of cold, hunger, and loneliness he had fashioned a small lean-to and could collect water and fish for food. One afternoon he returned to find that a spark from his cooking fire had burned all of his meager possessions. He laid down and cried in abject desolation. The next day a ship appeared on the horizon heading his way. He was rescued because of his smoke signal.

Look for the Blessing. Expect it. Give Thanks.

Have a blessed Thanksgiving Day,
Beth

To Friend or Unfriend?

2009-11-20T11:41:00.000-08:00

This week “unfriend” ws declared the word of the year by the Oxford American Dictionary. It means “to remove someone as a friend on a social networking site”. The word’s merit derives from its currency and potential longevity.

This says something very unsettling about the mood of our culture. We “friend” and “unfriend” with abandon, and with disregard for the human being on the other end of the cyber exercise. Time spent in front of a screen collecting vast numbers of “friends”, and then “unfriending” those that fall short of our expectations on any given day, is an activity we need to be aware of. Each “friend” translates to a real person with real feelings.

I recently saw a t.v. commercial with a mom and two tween daughters at the mall. Mom is on her blackberry while the girls discuss a boy who is disappointing. In the time it takes mom to discover there is money for more shopping in her checking account, the girls “are so over him”.

This beautifully illustrates the reason we unplug for Family Night. No screens, no earphones, no beeps to remind us that someone wants our attention, no television, no telephones, no texting… Just you and your family - together, talking, listening, learning, working as a team, and enjoying each other face-to-face. With Family Night by the Book you will know exactly how to accomplish this feat with ease and fun! We even give you the makings of an Electronic Drop Box to help everyone be fully present without distractions.

The Quick Start kit includes a great lesson on friendship. Check it out!

Would You Have Noticed?

2009-11-12T02:47:00.000-08:00

I have had several conversations and coaching sessions recently with people feeling restless, stressed, scattered, too busy – as if they are missing something, but cannot put their finger on it. Life is okay, family is doing well. Nothing is really wrong. But something is definitely not right.

Life is full, busy and fast. We often have the sense that what is most important and beautiful hovers on the periphery, just out of sight. Perhaps we will capture it tomorrow – or just as soon as we can carve out some time to really think about it.

We talk a lot here about staying in the moment; being mindful of what is happening in the present without thinking about the future, the past – or attending to the many thoughts that stream through all day long.

A couple of years ago Gene Weingarten, staff writer for the Washington Post, wrote a fascinating story about this very thing. I will cite parts in italics and you can read the complete article and watch the video by clicking here.

Joshua Bell, one of the world’s finest violinists, was asked to perform incognito as a street musician during morning rush-hour in a Washington,D.C. Metro station. He donned street clothes and took his 3.5 million dollar Stradivarius violin to a spot between the escalators, a shoe shine stand and a news kiosk. For 40 minutes he played some of the most beautiful and challenging music ever composed for over 1,000 people who passed by.

“The skin mags move, but it's that lottery ticket dispenser that stays the busiest, with customers queuing up for Daily 6 lotto and Powerball and the ultimate suckers' bait, those pamphlets that sell random number combinations purporting to be "hot." They sell briskly.
On Friday, January 12, the people waiting in the lottery line looking for a long shot would get a lucky break -- a free, close-up ticket to a concert by one of the world's most famous musicians -- but only if they were of a mind to take note.
Three minutes went by before something happened. Sixty-three people had already passed when, finally, there was a breakthrough of sorts. A middle-age man altered his gait for a split second, turning his head to notice that there seemed to be some guy playing music. Yes, the man kept walking, but it was something.
A half-minute later, Bell got his first donation. A woman threw in a buck and scooted off. It was not until six minutes into the performance that someone actually stood against a wall, and listened.
Things never got much better. In the three-quarters of an hour that Joshua Bell played, seven people stopped what they were doing to hang around and take in the performance, at least for a minute. Twenty-seven gave money, most of them on the run -- for a total of $32 and change. That leaves the 1,070 people who hurried by, oblivious, many only three feet away, few even turning to look.”

Mr. Bell admitted to being nervous, not knowing what to expect before he began. At first all his concentration was on playing the music, telling the story with his instrument. He didn’t really notice what was going on around him. He has played in the finest concert halls, with the finest orchestras, for crowned heads of state – where people stifle the slightest sound in awe and respect for his artistry. He acknowledged how strange it was to be ignored and to have no response as he finished a piece.

"At a music hall, I'll get upset if someone coughs or if someone's cellphone goes off. But here, my expectations quickly diminished. I started to appreciate any acknowledgment, even a slight glance up. I was oddly grateful when someone threw in a dollar instead of change."

I believe that everything important in life is about the nature and quality of our relationships and interactions with each other. That quote is profound. It speaks so deeply to our need to be acknowledged for who we are and what we have to contribute. I applaud Mr. Bell’s courage and vulnerability in revealing himself and his desire to connect with the people he was playing for.

Over 40 people were interviewed about their experience that morning. One mom, in a hurry to get her 3y.o old to day care and begin her day as an IT director for a federal agency, put her body between her son and Mr. Bell to keep him from pulling on her hand to stop and listen. All of the children who passed by noticed and wanted to stop, but were hurried along by adults…

What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.
-- from "Leisure," by W.H. Davies

“In his 2003 book, Timeless Beauty: In the Arts and Everyday Life, British author John Lane writes about the loss of the appreciation for beauty in the modern world. The experiment at L'Enfant Plaza may be symptomatic of that, he said -- not because people didn't have the capacity to understand beauty, but because it was irrelevant to them.
If we can't take the time out of our lives to stay a moment and listen to one of the best musicians on Earth play some of the best music ever written; if the surge of modern life so overpowers us that we are deaf and blind to something like that -- then what else are we missing?”

Being mindful requires careful listening. In Falling Awake by Dave Ellis he says, “Most people think that listening is what we do when someone else talks. Actually, we can expand the meaning of the word listen to its large sense which means receiving everything at all times. Listening can be a way of life, an attitude toward all things, an open posture to the world. The American Heritage Dictionary defines the word listen: ‘To make a conscious effort to hear; to pay attention; to heed’. Listening fully means paying exquisite close attention. When you pay attention your world gets bigger.
Listening means receiving whatever the world is “sending”. At any given moment, the world is sending plenty – thousands of tastes, sights, aromas, sounds, textures, ideas and information just waiting to be noticed. If we’re not careful we might tune out this symphony of sights, sounds, and sensations.”

Are you listening to all the world is sending?
Would you have noticed the soaring beauty of Joshua Bell’s violin?
Would you have stopped to watch and listen?
Would you have acknowledged him with your eyes, a smile, a word of praise or thanks, a donation?

Blessings,
Beth

From Your Head to Your Mouth

2009-10-29T09:54:00.000-07:00

“It’s hard to fight an enemy who has outposts in your head.”
Writer Sally Kempton

Last week we talked about the power of our thoughts, both positive and negative. If you missed it you can read the article “It’s All in Your Head” on the website or scroll down and read it here.

Right behind our thoughts come our spoken words (or in some unfortunate cases, our mouths get out in front of our heads). The following is paraphrased from In the Eye of the Storm by Max Lucado.

Once there was an old man who lived in a tiny village. Although poor, he was envied by all, for he owned a beautiful white horse. Even the king coveted his treasure. A horse like this had never been seen before – such majesty, splendor and strength.
People offered great sums for the steed but the man loved the horse and refused to sell, despite his poverty and great temptation.
One morning the horse was gone from his stable. The villagers called the old man a fool for not selling the horse before someone stole it. They scoffed at him for thinking he could hold and protect such an animal. He could have named his price, now the horse was gone and he was cursed with misfortune.
The old man responded, “Don’t speak too quickly. Say only that the horse is not in the stable. That is all we know; the rest is judgment. If I’ve been cursed or not, how can you know or judge?”
The people contested, “Don’t make us out to be fools! We may not be philosophers but great philosophy is not needed. The simple fact that your horse is gone is a curse.”
The old man spoke again. “All I know is that the stable is empty. The rest I don’t know. Whether it be a curse or a blessing, I can’t say. All we can see is a fragment. Who can say what will come next?”
The villagers laughed, more convinced that he was indeed a fool. He could have lived in luxury, but
was living in the misery of poverty. Now he had proven he was a fool with his foolish words.

Two weeks later the horse returned, bringing a dozen beautiful wild horses with him. The villagers gathered around him saying, “Old man you were right and we were wrong. What we thought was a curse was a blessing. Please forgive us.”
The man responded, “Once again you go too far. Say only that the horse is back and he has brought a dozen horses with him. Don’t judge. How do you know if this is a blessing or not? You see only a fragment, not the whole story. Life is so vast, yet you judge all of life with one page or one word. Don’t say that this is a blessing. No one knows. I am content with what I know. I am not perturbed by what I don’t”.

“Maybe the old man is right”, they said to one another, so they said little. But down deep, they knew he was wrong. They knew it was a blessing. The horses could be broken and sold for much money.

The old man had an only son. He began to work with the wild horses to break them. Soon after, he fell from one of the horses and broke both legs. The villagers gathered once again to cast their judgments. “You were right. The horses were not a blessing. They were a curse. Your only son has broken his legs and cannot help you in your old age and you are poorer than ever.”

“You people are obsessed with judging”, the old man said. “Don’t go so far. Say only that my son broke his legs. Who knows if it is a blessing or a curse? We have only a fragment. Life comes in fragments.”

Several weeks later the country went to war and all the young men of the village were required to join the army. Only the son of the old man was excluded due to his injury. The villagers gathered around crying and wailing because their sons had been taken. The enemy was fierce and the young men were unlikely to return.

“God knows you were right old man”, they wept. “Your sons broken legs were a blessing. At least he is with you and our sons are gone forever.”

The old man spoke again, “It is impossible to talk with you. You always draw conclusions. No one knows. Say only this. Your sons had to go to war and mine did not. No one knows if it is a blessing or a curse. No one is wise enough to know. Only God knows.”

This story illustrates how our thoughts and words get us into a swirl of doubt and anxiety. We follow it up with lamenting and judgment that may or may not be true. The end result is a mass of reactionary chaos inside and out. Remember, a thought is just a thought until we attach meaning and emotion to it and act on it.

When we can take a step back, observe what “is”, and avoid making interpretations, we are in a calmer more focused position to think clearly and problem solve. Mark Twain said, “I have known a great many disasters in my life. Most of them never happened.”

How we speak about the events and circumstances of our lives has great impact on how we respond. Notice your tone and your inflection. Observe how the meaning behind your words colors both your choice of words and how they sound to your own ears. Then follow the action. What behavior results from the way you talk about the event or circumstance? Do others join you and follow your lead? What happens to the relationship(s) involved?

Since the economic downturn my business has slowed. When people asked me how things were going I would say, “It has slowed down some. I am not as busy as I would like to be.” That was true, but I began to notice some resignation in my voice. Now I say, “My clients are making great progress and I am always looking for new and exciting opportunities.” Do you hear the difference? It is also true that opportunities and clients abound. There are still 6 billion people (potential clients) on the planet and no money has left the earth either. It is still here. There is no lack or shortage. And – lo and behold – some new and exciting opportunities are showing up.

There is great power in our thoughts and words. Choose and speak wisely. Refuse to participate in negativity.

Life is DEEP and it is W I D E
emerge…Explore…EXPAND

Beth

It's All in Your Head

2009-10-23T14:31:00.000-07:00

Scientific studies have estimated that you have about 60,000 thoughts each day. That’s pretty impressive huh? Until you realize that 98% of those are pretty much the same ones you had yesterday.

Victor Frankel was an Austrian neurologist and psychologist who survived the Holocaust in a Nazi concentration camp. He chronicles his experiences as an inmate and describes his psychotherapeutic method of finding meaning in all forms of existence, even the most sordid ones, and thus a reason to continue living.

Under Frankel’s care and encouragement, if a prisoner felt that he could no longer endure the realities of camp life, he found a way out in his mental life – an invaluable opportunity to dwell in the spiritual domain, the one that the SS were unable to destroy. Spiritual life strengthened the prisoner, helped him adapt, and thereby improved his chances of survival. Frankel attributes his own survival to the strength and health of his thought life.

I hope none of us ever have to face the horrors of a concentration camp – to challenge ourselves to maintain a positive outlook and a healthy thought life under such frightening conditions. Yet our everyday thought processes can trip us up in ways we may be completely unaware of.

Last week I discovered that Ravi Zacharias, a remarkable man and brilliant Christian apologist, is going to be at ASU for an open forum. The event is free but a ticket is required. I had two days before leaving town to secure tickets. I should also note that he is on my list of the people I would most like to meet in my life – strong motivation to get myself a seat! Procrastination is a thought process that creates obstacles in my life. Perhaps you are familiar with internal phrases like, “I will get that done tomorrow”; or “I’ll be going that way in a couple days and will take care of it then” or “I still have plenty of time.”

I left town for 4 days, procrastinated for 2 more and – SOLD OUT! This morning I had a good cry, chastised myself heartily and determined that I will go on the day of the event and camp out for several hours. I spoke to my friend Sally (thank you!) who suggested I call and see if there are volunteer opportunities that would get me inside. I am on a “list” and must call back on Monday morning. I repeated my name four times, expressed my strong desire to be a part of this event, and begged. We shall see…

Metacognition is a term that entails thinking about what you are thinking about vs. just having thoughts. People of strength are those who are firmly anchored. They are clear about their values, they are critical thinkers, and their thought life contributes to – and solidifies – their convictions. Thoughts are just thoughts. We don’t have to believe them or act on them. They have no meaning until we attach meaning and emotion to them. AND our thoughts have power. Acting on them after careful consideration translates that power into results.

I sincerely hope I will be able to hear Ravi Zacharias speak. If so, it will be an exciting and precious time indeed and made more so by the near miss. The point is, I could have avoided all of this turmoil by practicing a little metacognition, by moving and acting on a thought rather than dismissing it without really considering the ramifications. Stop and consider for a moment what the 98% of recurring thoughts each day could generate if we put a little thought into our thoughts. Where are you draining energy and power in your thought life? How could you shift your thinking to become an anchor and a place of strength for you? How does your spiritual connection generate power and conviction in your life?

“Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure,
whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if
anything worthy of praise, let your mind dwell on these things.” Philippians 4:8,9 Bible

Blessings,
Beth

Speak Your Significance

2009-10-08T07:38:00.000-07:00

I love writing this newsletter. I love who you are and how you express yourselves and share your hearts and minds. I love your willingness to be vulnerable and just put it out there. I love being able to pass on your wisdom.

Did you know that MOMS constitute the largest blog group in the world? Talk about power and something to say! Recently a reader discovered that her blog - temporarily a source of pain, embarrassment, and hiding - had become the catalyst for some deep knowing, personal significance, and the voice of heart expression.

She was asked at a casual social gathering with people she didn't know well,why she thought anyone would be interested in her mundane daily activities. Here are some excerpts of her thoughts.

"That very thought has crossed my own mind periodically. It's that dark, nasty voice that tries to deter us from doing anything significant or meaningful. It's that voice that makes us our own worst enemy. I have fought that rotten voice off for the 3+ years I have blogged and crafted, reminding myself to ignore it and carry on. Well that one fateful night last year was the physical manifestation of "the voice". It looked me in the eye and told me that I have no place speaking publicly. That my life is insignificant and no one cares. Sadly, that was more than I could take. I subconsciously decided to close up shop and quietly retreat back to my apparently insignificant life as a stay at home mom."

She admits to being disappointed in herself for not recognizing the mean spirited intent, calling it out, and moving on.

"I allowed this person to take my voice. Not the nasty one but the self-expressive one. The one that makes me feel alive and connected. The one that allows me to vent all of this creative and occasionally stifled energy and, in turn, makes me a better mother...a better person.

Over the months that I remained quiet, a very sad thing happened. I lost my voice. I forgot all that makes my mind race and my pulse speed up. Last week I realized how much I missed this little outlet of mine. Sharing about my family and daily activities is fun and I love that my distant relatives and friends can stay in the know, but what I missed most was sharing me. My thoughts, my hardships, my isms and revelations. I processed my thoughts this way and, most importantly, I received good, positive feedback from people who cared.

So here I am, confessing the truth and standing up to say...no yell

MY LIFE MATTERS. MY THOUGHTS MATTER. I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO SAY WHATEVER I WANT TO SAY IN AS PUBLIC A PLACE AS I WANT TO. YOU DON'T HAVE TO READ IT...HECK YOU DON'T EVER HAVE TO COME HERE AT ALL. BUT IF YOU DO, MY DOOR IS ALWAYS OPEN. AMEN"

Where are you denying your voice? Your heart? Your significance?
Where have you not told yourself the truth?
What are you longing to say - or YELL?

FAITH, HOPE, PROMISE

2009-09-13T07:07:00.004-07:00

I had the great privilege and pleasure to attend a Tea Party Express Rally last week. It was held in a park in my home town, Mishawaka Indiana, just blocks from my childhood home. Whatever your politics, it is crucial that your voice be heard.

As we remember the events of 9/11 - all that our country stands for, all that we are doing to protect our freedoms, those lost, those who heroically served and survived, and those who would destroy us - not for anything we've done, but for WHO we ARE - there is a symbol of faith, hope, and promise in the midst of the pain and loss.

Watch this video and know that God knows, sees, hears and is ever present.

President Obama's Speech to Students

2009-09-04T11:45:00.000-07:00

I have been asked by the Arizona Republic to talk about whether or not kids should attend and alternatives if they do not participate. The following is my submission. Whatever your politics or whether or not your kids will attend, this is a crucial conversation in our families, schools, communities, society, and in our churches and synagogues.

Blessings,

Beth

I have spent the last hour on google to get some perspective on this issue. My understanding of what the students will be asked to think about and answer is as follows:

During the Speech:

• As the President speaks, teachers can ask students to write down key ideas or phrases that are important or personally meaningful. Students could use a note-taking graphic organizer such as a Cluster Web, or students could record their thoughts on sticky notes. Younger children can draw pictures and write as appropriate. As students listen to the speech, they could think about the following:

What is the President trying to tell me?

What is the President asking me to do?

What new ideas and actions is the President challenging me to think about?

• Students can record important parts of the speech where the President is asking them to do something. Students might think about: What specific job is he asking me to do? Is he asking anything of anyone else? Teachers? Principals? Parents? The American people?

• Students can record any questions they have while he is speaking and then discuss them after the speech. Younger children may need to dictate their questions.

After the Speech:

• Teachers could ask students to share the ideas they recorded, exchange sticky notes or stick notes on a butcher paper poster in the classroom to discuss main ideas from the speech, i.e. citizenship, personal responsibility, civic duty. • Students could discuss their responses to the following questions:

What do you think the President wants us to do?

Does the speech make you want to do anything?

Are we able to do what President Obama is asking of us

It would benefit all concerned to have more information about the content of the speech before deciding whether or not to allow children to participate. As a parent, grandparent, psychotherapist, and parenting coach here is what I believe to be important and helpful from the information available.

Discussion about civic and personal responsibility, the value of education, the importance of setting and achieving goals, and encouraging others along the way is extremely important and valuable conversation. I coach parents to engage with their kids on these topics and give them the tools to do so.

So where’s the rub? We want our kids to be critical thinkers, to have good problem solving skills, to be able to express their opinions and debate issues with those of opposing viewpoints. Parents, you’re on! The family is the place to learn these skills and practice them. Your child’s belief system determines how he moves through the world and you are the primary source of that set of beliefs. If we want our kids to make value based decisions, we need to be sure they have a firm grasp of those values and understand clearly why it is important to live and behave in a particular way.

Whether your kids will be in or out of school on Tuesday September 8, this is a wonderful opportunity to have some honest, direct, family-values conversation.

If your child will be participating, be there next to him. Take notes. Find out what your child is thinking about, dreaming for herself , and what worries him. Be crystal clear in your own mind and heart what your values are and what you want to instill in your kids. You set your family’s culture and identity.

Take each point and run it through the filter of your family’s values and beliefs. If you say, “The Smith kids study hard and do their best.” or “In our family being a student is your job, just like mom and dad have jobs.” Or “Our family believes it is important to volunteer our time and money to help those who cannot help themselves.” Or “We value hard work and taking responsibility for our words and actions.” Or “ Our family values include honesty, pitching in, speaking the truth in love, respect for ourselves and others, and worshipping God together.”(add all your own family beliefs and values here) – then you can listen to the speech and easily and clearly decide what is aligned with your family culture and values. Your children will be able to discern those things that do not align and you have an amazing conversation underway

I encourage you all to choose your words carefully. Emotions and opinions are all over the map on this one. Your kids are watching and listening. Do not provoke them to anger or fear. Use this for the good of your family. Use this to have safe, meaningful, discussions about tough topics with those whose views may differ from your own. Use this to teach your kids how to do that. Use this to find out what your kids are thinking and feeling. Use this to deepen your relationships. Use this!

Beth Madigan

Parent Coach

www.livewithintention.org

602.626.8036

The 7 Principles of Fierce Conversations

2009-08-31T11:58:00.000-07:00

These principles are taken from Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott. Enjoy and Implement!

Principle 1: Master the courage to interrogate reality.

Reality has a habit of shifting. People change and forget to tell each other. Not only do we neglect to share this with others, we are skilled at masking it even to ourselves.

Principle 2: Come out from behind yourself into the conversation and make it real.

While many fear "real", it is the unreal conversation that should scare us to death. When the conversation is real, change occurs before the conversation is even over.

Principle 3: Be here, be prepared to be nowhere else.

Our work, our relationships, our lives succeed or fail one conversation at a time. While no single conversation is guaranteed to transform a relationship, any single conversation CAN. Speak and listen as if this the most important conversation you will ever have with this person. It may be.

Principle 4: Tackle your toughest challenge today.

Burnout doesn't occur because we're solving problems; it occurs because we're trying to solve the same problems over and over. The problem named is the problem solved. Confront the real obstacles. Travel light - agenda free.

Principle 5: Obey your instincts.

Don't just trust your instincts - obey them. Tune in. Pay attention. What we label as illusion is the scent of something real coming close.

Principle 6: Take responsibility for your emotional wake.

The conversation is not about the relationship; the conversation is the relationship. Learning to deliver the message without the load allows you to speak with clarity, conviction, and compassion. (speak the truth in love. Beth)

Principle 7: Let silence do the heavy lifting.

When there is a whole lot of talking going on, conversations can be so empty of meaning they crackle. Slow down the conversation, so that insight can occur in the space between words, and you can discover what the conversation really wants and needs to be about.

T.W.I.S.T.

2009-08-27T21:22:00.000-07:00

Oh! We are having fun with fierce women willing to have fierce conversations in the workshops! This week we discovered the secret to Getting Anyone to Do What You Want. T.he W.ay I. S.ee T.hings it's all about how you behave and what you say. BE the kind of person others are pleased to do things for - the kind of person others want to spend time with, to get along with, and to share themselves with.

Communicate honestly, directly, and clearly. EVERYTHING is about the nature and quality of our relationships. We succeed or fail one conversation at a time. Susan Scott, author of Fierce Conversations, says the conversation is not about the relationship - the conversation is the relationship.

She writes, "A fierce conversation? Doesn't fierce suggest menacing, cruel, barbarous, threatening? Sounds like raised voices, frowns, blood on the floor, no fun at all. In Roget's Thesaurus, the word fierce has the following synonyms: robust intense, strong, powerful, passionate, eager, unbridled, uncurbed, untamed. In it's simplest form, a fierce conversation is one in which we come out from behind ourselves into the conversation and make it real."

You know how I love a word study! I am loving the word fierce - don't you? Stay tuned for the 7 principles of Fierce conversations. Until then BE fierce.

Find Your Music

2009-08-22T21:36:00.000-07:00

This week I had wonderful evening with some wonderful women. Lanette Rajski, my friend and colleague, and I facilitated a workshop called Quit the Chaos. Each woman came with some pretty daunting circumstances. Because they were willing to be honest and do some work, everyone left with tools to calm their minds, build energy reserves, and develop stress resiliency. Sometimes the biggest hurdle is carving out time for ourselves - seeing ourselves as worthy and giving ourselves permission to put everyone and everything else aside for few hours.

I want to invite you to do just that. Scroll down and register or click right here for an e-class (one that is delivered to your e-mail inbox and can be done on your own schedule) that will forever change the way you think of your wellness and the importance of taking time out to take good C.A.R.E of yourself! Don't hesitate. Don't tell yourself you will think it over. Don't wait for a "better" time. The time is now. Class begins Monday September 7! AND it is deeply discounted for this offering. See you there!

Now for more of When the Heart Waits. "It's anguish to come to that place in life where you know all of the words and none of the music."

She tells a story of taking a long walk on a chilly evening, feeling restless and frustrated. She came upon a cocoon and immediately knew it was an epiphany to grace her inner darkness; God speaking to her about waiting, transformation, and hope. She broke the twig off and carried it gingerly home where she grafted it, with duct tape, to her own backyard tree. "I stood at the window watching the cocoon, which hung in the winter air like an upside-down question mark. Live the question, God whispered. Crisis, change, all the myriad upheavals that blister the spirit and leave us groping - they aren't voices simply of pain but also of creativity. And if we would only listen, we might hear such times beckoning us to a season of waiting, to the place of fertile emptiness."

Summer days are dwindling. Fall is in the air with the promise of quieter and slower days. I know many of you resonate with Sue Monk Kidd's blistered spirit in the face of upheaval, change, and crisis. Are you being asked to enter a cocoon? Do you sense a shift ahead? Is transformation calling to your heart? Are you feeling anticipation - or anxiety - or both? Think of it as an invitation directly from God's heart to yours. Enter the chrysalis. Wait for the sound of the music - YOUR music.

When the Heart Waits

2009-08-06T13:29:00.000-07:00

Goodness! The days fly by...I have had a great week with girlfriends at the lake and am currently ensconced in a Chicago suburb with my grandkids. On the way here I began a book given to me at the lake last week, When the Heart Waits by Sue Monk Kidd, written in 1990. If you have read any of her books (Secret Life of Bees) you know what a gifted author she is and how her style draws you in. This one is really resonating with me. She talks about change, waiting, and spiritual growth or "soulmaking".

"It's always difficult and risky to try to put soulmaking into words. In many ways waiting is the missing link in the transfromation process...waiting as the passionate and contempative crucible in which new life and spiritual wholeness can be birthed."

She describes her life as making no sense, "curled up into the frightening mark of a question." To all appearances she looked and seemed fine, but inside she was in turmoil with a "chorus of orphaned voices crying out for all the unlived parts of me."

"As a woman I sometimes felt that I had been scripted to be all things to all people. But when I tried, I usually ended up forfeiting my deepest identity, my own unique truth as God's creature."

She began her journey of transformation with T.S.Eliot's question, "Do I dare/Disturb the universe?/ She wondered, "Is it possible that I'm being summoned from some deep and holy place within? Am I being asked to enter a new passage in the spiritual life - the journey from the false self to the true self? Am I being asked to dismantle old masks and patterns and unfold a deeper, more authentic self - the one God created me to be? Am I being compelled to disturb my inner universe in quest of the undiscovered being who clamors from within?"

I wrote to you in the last newsletter that I woud be blogging this month about whatever was put on my heart. I love God's synchronicity and timing. Thank you, Kim for the gift of this book and for listening to the nudge to give it to me. My universe has been disturbed and I am stepping in. I am not yet sure of what I am being asked to do but I know I will be given the grace and strength to meet the challenge.

Mother's Day All Year Long!

2009-07-29T20:29:00.000-07:00

You all know we talk a lot about self care here. Join me for an eClass designed to help you take very good C.A.R.E. of yourselves.This offering is a pilot group and is deeply discounted.
If you haven't seen it or have procrastinated you can get the information and register by clicking here.

The class will be delivered to your e-mail inbox each Monday in September. Look for your back to school, time for me, takin' good C.A.R.E. lessons on September 7, 14, 21, & 28.

We will be underway soon and spaces are going fast!
Click here to read more and register!

It's a Four Letter Word

2009-07-29T20:25:00.001-07:00

Knowledge is power. Isn't it? We've always heard that is so. What does it mean? What constitutes knowledge and what kind of power does it hold?

Let's unpack the word KNOW and see what we find there.

K - Knowledge is a key to something powerful. I looked up the meaning of key. It's for opening that which was locked. It also means something explanatory, as in a key concept or idea and is part of a reference system. In the world of music key refers to tonality or pitch. Doesn't what we know - or don't know - set the tone or pitch of our thinking, perceptions, and attitudes?

N - Knowing is the ability to put a name to what we know - to directly appoint or
identify it. A name is a descriptive word, referring to a family or clan, It has a
reputation attached to it. How do your family and the way you grew up contribute to what you know? What do others know about you through your name and reputation?

O - There's an object of our knowledge - "a person to which action or feeling is directed". There is a two-fold objective as well. First, to have an objective as a purpose, goal, or aim. Second, to be objective by being unbiased and free from personal prejudices. How has your knowledge been gained? What is your objective?

W - We like to think of knowledge and wisdom walking hand in hand. To be wise is to possess the power of discernment and of judging rightly. Wise people have knowledge, learning, and experience. Wisdom is the power to see and choose the best and highest goal, and the surest means to attaining it. How do knowing and wisdom partner up for you? Are you able to be unbiased and judge rightly? Where would you like to gain knowledge and wisdom?

I have asked you several questions. I recently read an article about the value of inquiry. The author's query was about our children. Are we teaching them to ask questions, to gain knowledge, to become wise? Or are we teaching them that there is a simple, quick answer and it is either right or wrong? As a coach powerful, provocative questions are at the heart of what I do. I say, by all means - ask the question!

This week think about what you know and the wisdom in your knowing. Then decide what you will DO with it. What's your objective? Go! That's where the power is.

Let us know what you KNOW and what you will do with it! What is the gnawing, relentless, objective rolling around in there? I am going to do some serious exploration myself in the next month. I'll keep you posted on the blog as knowledge and wisdom show themselves.

Soon,
Beth

THOUGHT WATCH

2009-07-16T08:40:00.001-07:00

Last week we talked about this year's second half. you know what that means about the summer don't you?! Despite the busyness and speed of the "lazy" days of summer, we can all take some time to stop, get quiet, and practice some mindfulness. Let's practice a little right now. Really! Just 90 seconds while you are taking time to read this. Take a moment to stand, relax your head and shoulders, and drop your arms comfortably at your sides. Feel all four corners of your feet (if you can be barefoot and/or outside, all the better) firmly on the floor or ground. Now take 4 or 5 deep breaths with a calming thought atached. For example, "I am totally at peace." or "All is well"

Add a breath mantra with each inhalation and exhalation. "I am breathing in joy. I am breathing out frustration." Use whatever you need in this moment.

Read the complete article here and come back and post your summer mindfulness thoughts and techniques. We all want to know so we can benefit too!
If you don't already receive the newsletters click for your FREE subscription!

Let Freedom RING

2009-07-02T09:51:00.000-07:00

Webster defines Freedom:

The absence of coercion or constraint in choice or action; Liberation from the power of another; independence, exemption, release, liberty, or license.

With vast freedom comes great responsibility. Read the entire article here

(after Friday) and post your thoughts.

What is your definition of freedom? What does it mean in your life?

RELATIONSHIP ABCs

2009-06-24T23:40:00.000-07:00

I believe that everything is life is about the nature and quality of our relationships and the choices we make. Whether you are a spouse, parent, friend, sibling. boss, relative, employee, or acquaintance, you can apply the ABCs of Strong Relationships. We are designed to fit with one another and do life together. You will notice how these concepts entwine with each other - what I call God's synchronicity in the world.

A - ADAPT Be flexible. Everything Changes. No two people grow at the same rate.
"Blessed are the flexible for they shall never be bent out of shape." - M McGriffy -

B - BUILD UP Ask yourself if what you are doing or saying is building up or tearing down. Aim for positive,
healthy, helpful interactions.
"There are two ways of exerting one's strength - one is pushing down, the other is
pulling up." - Booker T. Washington -

C - COMMUNICATE Honest, direct conversation is usually best. Check in with the other person to be sure
you are both clear. If not, clarify and check in again.
"Seek first to understand, then to be understood." - Stephen Covey -

Read the rest of the article then come back and psot your own ABCs for Strong Relationships

SMARTS IN A SECOND

2009-06-01T17:09:00.000-07:00

Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland,"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most-requested column I've ever written."My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

What would you add to this list? Let's create a list of "Smarts in a Second" to encourage us and give us a boost whenever we need one - FAST!

Twelve Transforming Words

2009-05-19T12:43:00.000-07:00

There are four behaviors so toxic that relationship expert John Gottman has labeled them the Four Horsemen of the Apacolypse. Read about them in the May 7 newsletter archived here. The good news is that there are 12 Transforming Words that go a long way to heal the hurts left by the Four Horsemen.

What do you think? Do the Four Horsemen ride roughshod in your relationship? Are you willing to make some changes? Post your thoughts here.

It's all about the space between You and Me - the US that is Holy Ground. Nurturing and protecting that space is crucial to long lasting and fulfilling relationships. The entire article is here (after May 21). Feeling safe and creating safety for others are also paramount to achieving success. There has been considerable resonance and conversation about building relationships. Let's get some community dialogue going and encourage each other. I consider US to be Holy Ground and thank you for all you bring!

Let Your Dream SING!

2009-04-16T15:38:00.000-07:00

Susan Boyle, 47 y.o., never been kissed, caretaker for her mum - walked out on stage and shared her dream in a way that will delight, astound and inspire you! Oh! God gifts us in such interesting and amazing ways. This is a treat. Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-KiGva9dV4

Shake it Off and Step Up!

2009-04-16T10:41:00.001-07:00

One day a farmer a farmer discovered that his old mule had fallen into an abandoned well pit he had been meaning to fill. He ran to get help from his neighbors but soon realized there was nothing to be done. Sadly, they began to throw shovels full of dirt into the pit. The hurt and frightened mule, understanding his plight, hung his head and brayed pitifully. Suddenly, despite dirt and rocks raining down on his back, he realized he could shake it off and step up. Thus began the arduous process of, just a little at a time, shaking it off and stepping up. Bruised and battered he was finally able to shake it off and step up over the lip of the well and onto the ground.

Are you facing some trials? Do you feel the weight of each shovel full on your back? I am ready to help you to SHAKE IT OFF AND STEP UP! You can live in joy and victory.

Read the entire article (after Friday) then come on back and share!

WHO HAS IT BEEN FOR YOU?

2009-04-09T15:20:00.000-07:00

Here's a short quiz:
Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
Name the last five Nobel Prize winners.
List the last few Academy Award winners for Best Actor or Best Film.
List the last five opposing presidential candidates and their running mates.

How did you do?
None of us remembers the headliners of yesterday - much less last year or last decade. These are not second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. And yet.....

Read the enitre article here; take a couple more quizzes and come back and post your thoughts!

PLANT YOUR GARDEN

2009-04-05T22:27:00.000-07:00

I got this from my lifelong friend Nancy. I don't know who to credit it to.
Enjoy!
FOR THE GARDEN OF YOUR DAILY LIVING,
PLANT THREE ROWS OF PEAS:

1. Peace of mind
2. Peace of heart
3. Peace of soul

PLANT FOUR ROWS OF SQUASH:

1. Squash gossip
2. Squash indifference
3. Squash grumbling
4. Squash selfishness

PLANT FOUR ROWS OF LETTUCE:

1. Lettuce be faithful
2. Lettuce be kind
3. Lettuce be patient
4. Lettuce really love one another

NO GARDEN IS WITHOUT TURNIPS:

1. Turnip for meetings
2. Turnip for service
3. Turnip to help one another

TO CONCLUDE OUR GARDEN WE MUST HAVE THYME:

1. Thyme for each other
2.. Thyme for family
3.. Thyme for friends

WATER FREELY WITH PATIENCE AND CULTIVATE WITH LOVE. THERE IS MUCH FRUIT IN YOUR GARDEN BECAUSE YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW.

OH! Those Nasty Gremlins

2009-03-19T11:33:00.000-07:00

Your gremlin is the narrator in your head. His objective is to make you
miserable, to doubt yourself and to crush any ideas you may have about
being worthwhile or purposeful. He is devious and insidious and will use any
means possible, including your past mistakes, to get you to live in fear of
stepping out. His aim is to keep you firmly inside his box of lies and
self-limiting beliefs until you are convinced they are true.

Read the complete article here. What are your gremlins? What agreements would you like to break?

This is a wonderful place to begin journaling! Join us for the workshop on

Thursday March 26. Scroll down for complete information. See you there!

Now I Know

2009-03-12T00:23:00.001-07:00

At the beginning of each year I turn to a clean, blank page of my journal and record a Word, a Theme, and a Goal for the year.

At the top of this year’s shiny new page I wrote:
2009
The Year of CONVERGENCE
THEME: Walk with God
WORD: Adventure
GOAL:

Yada became a mantra and a prayer. It showed up in my journal dozens of times and it eased my fears and encouraged me to action when I felt I couldn’t act.

Read the article about how I discovered this year's goal and come back and post your thoughts.

Journaling Workshop

2009-03-12T00:17:00.000-07:00

- Discover the benefits and power of journaling. Did you know it reduces stress?

- Get quiet and still. Quiet the monkey mind chatter, Ahhhh!

- Engage in a meditation to prepare you to write. Just let your mind drift - no agenda or time constraints

- Learn a wonderful technique for discovering what's most important to explore and write about.

- Do some journaling!

- Get a worksheet and suggestions to keep you goingWe will take our mini sabbatical via telephone.

If you have not done this before no worries - it is easy and fun. You can curl up in your favorite quiet spot with your journal, a cup of tea, and you can do it in your sweats or jammies!

Thursday March 26 6-7:30 Pacific time

cost is $20.00 There are a limited number of spaces on the bridge line so call 602.626.8036 or e-mail beth.madigan@cox.net today to reserve your space.

"I want to write but more than thatI want to bring out all kinds

of thingsthat lie buried in my heart." - Anne Frank -

WHY WEIGHT?

2009-03-12T00:15:00.001-07:00

• Are you a carb addict?
• Have you tried several diets?
• Do you have the metabolism of a snail?
• Have you lost weight only to find it again with friends?
• Are you ready for a lifestyle change?

If You Answered “YES” to any of these questions…
You’re Invited to Become a Part of the Next
Transitions Lifestyle Class

The eight week program includes:
- A Transitions daily journal which outlines the program
- Easy to follow low glycemic meal plans
- Stress Resiliency Techniques and Personal Growth Coaching
- Weight Management Coaching with Exercise and Fitness Tips
- Weekly Meetings, Recipes, Educational Materials, and Resources
- Nutritional Supplements

ATTEND A FREE TRANSITIONS OVERVIEW
Wednesday March 18, 2009 10:30 – 11:30 a.m.
at
Phoenix Jazzercise 12228 N. Cave Creek Road, Phoenix
Join Fitness Expert Kim Fullmer
and
Life Strategist Beth Madigan LCSW,CLC
Classes will begin the week of March 23
Bring a friend. We’re better together!

What are you WEIGHTING for? Questions?
Contact: Kim Fullmer kfullmer1@cox.net 602.741.3681
Beth Madigan beth.madigan@cox.net 602.626.8036

Thump. Thump. Thump

2009-03-05T08:17:00.000-08:00

The potter thumps his work to see if it is ready. if it "sings" it is done. It it "thuds" it goes back in the oven. We all have daily thumps that frustrate and challenge us. What's our response? Read the complete article and come back and post your thoughts. Let us know what works for you or how we can help you to cope in more helpful ways.

Ask the RIGHT Question

2009-02-14T07:58:00.000-08:00

What is the RIGHT question? How should we think about things? From what perspective?
This is about allowing events to shape our thinking and drive our actions toward what we believe is right - toward standing strong in our highest values - toward reshaping events. Read the entire article here, then come back and post your thoughts. Let us know how you are being or will be changed. What will you do differently?

GIRLFRIENDS

2009-02-03T09:32:00.000-08:00

Girlfriends make all the difference in women's lives. Watch this video and read the article, including an exercise, in this week's newsletter (dated Feb.5, 2009)

What do your girlfriends bring to your life? What kind of girlfriend are you? What aspects of your friendships would you like to change or grow? How does the exercise help you to think about your friendships and how you are perceived?

"Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor.

For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his (her) companion...

A cord of three strands is not easily broken." (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 The Bible)

A Matter of Degrees

2009-01-29T13:22:00.001-08:00

Max Anderson and Sam Parker expressed a communication concept that is remarkable. Here it is:

At 211 degrees...water is hot.

At 212 degrees...it boils.

And with boiling water, comes steam.

And steam can power a locomotive.

And, it's that one extra degree that...

Makes all the difference.

Read the complete article here and Share the thing you will pursue with 212 determination and fearlessness! How are Fear, Doubt, Criticism, "Yes, but", and "What if" keeping you from what you really want?

Embrace Your Inner ________!

2009-01-21T14:31:00.000-08:00

Truth, as I see it, is we can be whatever we want to be. We have to remove the labels we, and others, put on us. Jock, nerd, artist, right-brained, left-brained. None of those really mean anything because we are whoever we decided to be. And maybe, just maybe, my boy will embrace his inner artist....cool!”

Read the article here.

I have a couple of Inner_______! One is to play the piano. It is on my list of things for 2009. I am going to find a teacher for adults and will keep you posted. The other is laguages. I am good at them. They come pretty easily. I used to speak French and was fluent in American Sign Language but have not picked up my hands for years. I would love to add Italian and Spanish and would like to coach in Spanish and Sign Language.

OK - What's yours?

9 for a FINE '09

2009-01-13T14:34:00.000-08:00

Amazingly, we are here again - the beginning of a brand spanking New Year. The world is in turmoil, our financial system is in chaos, and our political system is besieged. And yet, there is a hopeful expectation in the air. Can you feel it? I believe God does His best work in the darkest places. And necessity is the mother of invention. If you were laid off or lost your home, you've got to DO something; something different and something right now! If your business is showing the effects of the economic slowdown, you've got to get creative, resourceful, and motivated to try some new things! If you are feeling restless or discontent NOW is the time to stop, get quiet, and listen to the voice of your heart; to wake up, get up, and move up! You already have EVERYTHING you need to be the person you envision and to create the life you desire. Begin the DISCOVERY process and make 2009 really FINE - even downright SUBLIME

Read the entire article here - all 9 ideas for a GREAT '09. What one thing woudl make this a FINE year for you? Post it here and come back often to see what others are thinking.

GIRLFRIENDS GETAWAY!

2009-01-13T14:26:00.000-08:00

Join us February 20-22 for a weekend of GREAT girlfriend time!

Change your perspective and make 2009 your BEST YEAR EVER! Relax, Renew and Reconnect in the company of some amazing girlfriends. Join us in beautiful, quaint Union Pier on the shores of Lake Michigan.This weekend is all about YOU. There will be powerful learning and discovery with a good dose of raucous fun and a sprinkling of quiet down time. Read and register now. DON'T MISS THIS!

THE REST OF THE STORY

2009-01-05T19:04:00.000-08:00

More about Aunt Irma's Lesson. I left out a MOST important part of the lesson as it has developed heart and legs over time. I spoke with Lanette this evening. It is true that Hank neither knows nor remembers the flight down or the great birthday party in his honor. He was, in fact, surprised (several times) that all the birthday hoopla was for him. It's about the servant heart and doing the right thing just because it's the right thing. It's about how we treat each other. You see, the past several days have been hugely challenging - even heartbreaking. Difficult decisions need to be made. Hank is blissfully unaware of most of it. But Emma (Lanette's MIL) knows and Lanette knows and the nieghbors know and extended family and friends know. Love, sensitivity, compassion, support, advocating, planning, and standing in the gap for another are being modeled and lived. And that matters. Oh how that matters.

Aunt Irma's Lesson

2008-12-31T20:47:00.000-08:00

“Sweetheart, Grandma is trapped inside her own head. She lives there all the time now. Much of what is in there is not pleasant. She had some hard times in her life and did not respond well to her circumstances. Many of her relationships have been damaged and broken and never repaired. We don’t know what is going to happen to us or how we will die. Someday you might have to live inside your head. Make sure you live well. Create a place in your head and heart you would like to spend time in. Remember that you are always making memories. Be happy. Help others. Follow God. Spread love. Do your best.”

Read the entire article (If it is not there yet, check back. My web guy is on vacation but will get it up soon!) Come back and post your greatest life lesson to date. When did you learn it? Who taught you? How has it impacted you? Have you passed it on to anyone else?

It's OK - You Don't Have To

2008-12-11T10:04:00.001-08:00

I am wanting clarity, for things to make sense, to KNOW what I am to be doing, and to be SURE I am on the right track. Don’t we all want the answers? Don’t you find yourself working events and situations around and around, over and over? Are you sometimes distrustful that things will occur in the way and time that they are meant to? Or that they will occur EVER?

Read the entire article here. If you are not a subscriber we would love to have you join us. It's FREE so come join the community.

Contemplate these Appreciative Inquiries in your quiet time or in your journal. Don't journal? Not sure how to get going? Look below for the Journaling Workshop and come along!

Think of a highpoint in life - a time when you felt most alive, engaged, inspired, or successful. Who was involved? What made it a highpoint? What was happening? How did you feel?

That should get you started. There will be more Appreciateve Inquiries so keep checking back. Be sure to post your ponderings, writings, experiences.

T.W.I.S.T.

2008-12-09T15:22:00.000-08:00

As you plan, shop, prepare and party I hope you are setting aside some time to get quiet.

T.he W.ay I.S.ee T.hings this is the reason for the season and such a gorgeous rendition by

two of the world's great talents. Enjoy! May God richly bless you and yours.

450 BILLION!

2008-12-02T14:47:00.000-08:00

We spent 450 billion dollars for Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanza and other holiday gift giving last year. Who doesn't love to give and recieve lovely gifts?! Nothing wrong with that.

But there IS something wrong with this...

More people die from drinking unclean water than from any other cause. I have been to Africa and watched children walk miles for water that was not fit to drink. We can solve the problem, world-wide, for 10 billion dollars! There are many programs you can

donate to. Check on-line and find one you can get behind!

The point is to take a look at what you have and spend some portion of your budget on helping someone else have a better life. Give yourself away! Not just money - your time, attention and talents. You have such amazing gifts to offer. Let someone else benefit from all you know and can do. You get the joy! Such a great deal!

Journal Workshop!

2008-11-26T22:09:00.001-08:00

In this workshop you will:
- Discover the benefits and power of journaling. Did you know it reduces stress?
- Get quiet and still. Quiet the monkey mind chatter, Ahhhh!
- Engage in a meditation to prepare you to write. Just let your mind drift – no agenda or time constraints
- Learn a wonderful technique for discovering what’s most important to explore and write about.
- Do some journaling!
- Get a worksheet and suggestions to keep you going
We will take our mini sabbatical via telephone. If you have not done this before no worries – it is easy and fun. You can curl up in your favorite quiet spot with your journal, a cup of tea, and you can do it in your sweats or jammies!

I am offering two time choices so you can ALL participate.
Thursday January 8, 2009 from 6-9 p.m. Mountain Time (8-11 Eastern Time)
Saturday January 10, 2009 from 8-11 a.m. Mountain Time (10-1 Eastern Time)
The cost is $20.00
There are a limited number of spaces on the bridge line so call 602.626.8036 or e-mail beth.madigan@cox.net today to reserve your space.

“I want to write but more than that
I want to bring out all kinds of things
that lie buried in my heart.”
- Anne Frank –

In Everything Give Thanks

2008-11-26T21:58:00.001-08:00

Corrie Ten Boom was a prisoner in a Nazi Concentration Camp during World War II. She learned to give thanks for everything - even fleas. Read the entire article and come back and post your own story of finding joy and blessing in the most unlikely and difficult circumstances.

One of the strongest examples in my own life is my divorce. It will forever be one of the great sadnesses of my life - and also one of the greatest blessings. Because of the break up of my marriage I found my life's work and purpose. I have become a woman I could not have become within that relationship. God has used loss, sadness, anger, and disappointment to grow me and my children in so many ways. I wish it had been different, AND I am grateful. Things are not always either/or. They can be both/and. What do you think?

T.W.I.S.T

2008-11-20T08:12:00.000-08:00

Willard Wigan is an ordianary man - he can neither read nor write - doing EXTRAORDINARY things! Made to feel shameful and small as a child, he set out to show us how significant small can be.

T.he W.ay I. S.ee T.hings God designed each of us for greatness and nothing is too small or insignificant for him to use. Read the article and come back and share your thoughts.

CONVERGENCE

2008-11-13T14:42:00.000-08:00

Convergence is defined as: the tendency to move toward one point, to meet; to come together and unite in a common interest or focus; independent development of similar characters.

A destiny is not something waiting for you, but something waiting within you. God has designed you to live a life beyond your wildest imagination. When you EXPECT your dreams to become your life, you find the strength and resolve to focus. You go from having POTENTIAL to being POTENT.

Focus all of who you are until you have CONVERGENCE of all

your energies.

Who am I?

Where am I going?

What should I be doing?

Who am I becoming?

Read the rest of the article and leave your thoughts and hopes here! Let's CONVERGE!

T.W.I.S.T.

2008-11-04T14:33:00.000-08:00

"The subconscious mind makes no distinction between constructive and destructive thoughts. It works with the material we feed it. Our subconscious mind will translate into reality a thought driven by fear, just as readily as it will a thought driven by courage or faith."
- Napoleon Hill -

T.he W.ay I. S.ee T.hings this is absolute truth. You think about 60,000 thoughts a week. What are you thinking about? What are you focusing on? What if you were to feed your brain only positive, helpful, courageous, faithful, solution focused, joyful, empowering thoughts? hhmmm....

T.W.I.S.T

2008-10-31T10:25:00.000-07:00

T.he W.ay I. S.ee T.hings it's all in the in-between.

"It’s not so much that we’re afraid of change or so in love with the
old ways, but it’s that place in between that we fear. It’s like being
in between trapezes. It’s Linus when his blanket is in the dryer.
There’s nothing to hold on to." – Marilyn Ferguson –

Read the entire article and come back and post your change and transition thoughts and experiences.

Take the Stage!

2008-10-22T23:13:00.000-07:00

T.W.I.S.T
T.he W.ay I. S.ee T.hings some of life's very best gifts come to us in the midst of the most difficult circumstances.
What music is filling your soul? What longing floats to the surface, gets stuck, then floats back down to remain unsettled for another day? What fear keeps you from stepping out in faith and confidence? Your music comes from your soul, not your circumstances. Read the article and post your fears and obstacles, your soul's desire, your innate sense of being called to come up higher. Let's encourage each other to let our music rise!

You Can Make a Difference

2008-10-22T23:09:00.000-07:00

Saturday is Make a Difference Day. You can and do make a difference in the world. You can and do make a difference in someone's life. Grab your husbands and kids, your family and friends and GO make a difference. Check out
www.makeadifferenceday.com for ideas and to see what other people are up to.

This is about acknowledgement and encouragement and love. Who do you know that could use some appreciation, respect, love, and caring? Where in your community can you and your family make a difference? It doesn't have to be anything big - mow a lawn,pick up trash, take a meal or cookies, use your imagination and listen to your heart. Post your Make a Difference activities. The world needs men and women, moms and dads, boys and girls, who are willing to step up and Make A Difference!

T.W.I.S.T

2008-10-15T23:53:00.000-07:00

I have listened to the swirl of conversation in the past few weeks. Buy. Sell. Hold out and stick. More government. Less government. Raise taxes. Lower taxes. Free market. Wealth distribution. Fairness. I know many of you are struggling financially. My own financial picture has changed as a result of the market chaos. I was a little panicky (okay – a lot panicky) for a few days.

Steve Forbes was on a news show I was watching, talking about this distorted view we have developed – as if there is a pie – and only one pie. Then he made a statement that brought tears to my eyes and helped to change my perspective and calm my fears. Abundance and wealth are not contained in a pie that we must struggle to get slivers or slices from. They are limitless.

The Way I See Things, this is completely true. Our God is a God of abundance and generosity. He never experiences need, lack, or shortage. The world is an infinitely abundant place! There is plenty for EVERYONE and always more available. Even if all of my money disappears it does not demonstrate lack or scarcity in the world, and I have been given resources and skills to help meet my needs. And money does not define my wealth. Do you, like me, love being outside in this beautiful fall weather? Do you have health , friends and family who care for you, a job, a comfortable home, a dependable car, food on your table, a sense of purpose to your life? Are you moved by beauty or tragedy or the needs and misfortune of others? Do you laugh and cry with ease? You are rich indeed.

Read the rest of the article and post your thoughts!

T.W.I.S.T.

2008-10-08T23:52:00.000-07:00

The Way I See Things this client is on to something Beautiful! Read her exploration of her thoughts and feelings about winning then come back and post your own. What's your definition? What messages about winning and losing did you get in your childhood? How do they play out now?

T.W.I.S.T

2008-09-25T14:30:00.001-07:00

The WayI See Things your family is an organization. It is the most IMPORTANT organization on earth. It is complex, ever changing, demanding, rewarding, challenging, and contributes to the well-being of every single human on this planet. No, that is NOT an exaggeration. Every one of us came from some kind of family organization and it helped to define who each one of us has become. That, in turn, has played out in the state of our world today. Look around. If you need suggestions, try looking in Washington D.C. and Los Angeles. You can tell who was groomed, trained, and molded in which kind of organization. Read the complete article

You are the CEO of an organization that will CHANGE the WORLD!

The Chief Energizing Officer

The Constant Empowering Owl

What is your CEO (or any other) acronym? Let your awesome creativity and dedication SHINE and share it with us.

KIDS AND MONEY

2008-09-17T21:38:00.001-07:00

How our kids think about money comes directly from our own beliefs about money. Take a few minutes to think about your own childhood and the things that contributed to your current attitudes and beliefs. How was money handled? Was there “enough”? Were there arguments about money? Were you encouraged to save or give? How much did you know about the family finances? Did you control your own money? How much? At what age? Are you generous? Tight? Open? Secretive?

Read the entire article and post your thoughts, challenges, and tips for kids and money in your home.

What's Your POPEYE?

2008-09-04T23:53:00.000-07:00

What's the thing that makes you roll up your sleeves, get that steely glint in your eye, and declare, "I's fed up, and I's not gonna take it nomore!"

Read the entire article, then come back and let us know!

YES! YOU CAN!

2008-09-02T12:13:00.000-07:00

Feeling a little down or discouraged? Here's something to lift your spirits. Take six minutes to watch, then go and shine! Lift someone else's spirits. "With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26 (Bible) Dwell in possibility.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GF9wo9sVn2c

STUCK

2008-08-28T18:38:00.001-07:00

You know the sensation when you take a pill and it feels as if it is lodged somewhere between your throat and your stomach? You know how it feels when your words get stuck in that unspoken, limbo place? Read more and come on back to post your thoughts.

T.W.I.S.T.

2008-08-28T18:33:00.001-07:00

I grew up not far from Gary, Indiana, the steel capital of the mid-west. The strength of the steel is carefully measured. It is twisted, stretched, and crushed to discover what kind of stress it can withstand before it is used to build cars, bridges, freighters, jets, or skyscrapers.
How are you being tested and measured? The Way I See Things, when we are twisted, stretched, and pressured it is to strengthen us. It is to prevent us from collapsing. It is to build a thing of beauty and enduring significance

What Would You Take?

2008-08-21T15:16:00.001-07:00

Refugees in Georgia are being forced from their homes with just minutes to gather belongings. They don't know if they will ever return. In this week's Mothering MOMent we are exploring the question, "What would you take?" Please read it and post your answer.

In my backpack would be the photo of all of us at my parents 60th anniversary, my bible, my journal, a small rock that says "Listen - and be led" and my favorite very small, white heart shaped rock. (I LOVE rocks and collect heart shaped ones from wherever I go) This little white one sits on my desk to remind me to stay at the center of God's heart, to listen with my heart, and to coach from my heart. It was given to me by my oldest grandson, Jack. Amen.

Talk To Me Like I'm SomeoneYou Love

2008-08-16T15:16:00.001-07:00

How do you speak to the ones you love? How do they speak to you? Would an observer know you loved each other?
Read More and come back and post our thoughts.

T.W.I.S.T

2008-08-13T22:54:00.000-07:00

????
What would you do with 547,600? Are you thinking of all the things you could buy, bills you could pay, places you could go? I'm not talking about money. I'm talking about the way you would spend all the minutes in a year.
The Way I See Things, and I am including myself here, we spend our precious minutes on things that don't matter in the long run. We get bogged down in the busyness and detail. What really matters moves to the end of the line. We miss this moment and this day, because we are busy planning and moving on to the next. Stop, relax,find the joy and Enjoy!

T.W.I.S.T.

2008-07-30T11:34:00.000-07:00

The Way I See Things

I was gone for a month. It was all fun and games, but my yard was a real mess when I got home. As I began to get things in order I saw my garden as a metaphor for life and growth.

To grow a beautiful,healthy garden requires sunshine AND rain, fertilizer (you know - poop), going DEEP (all the way down to the roots), and lots of PRUNING (dead-heading, cuting away, clearing out). So it must go, to grow a beautiful, healthy woman of strength and excellence.

Practice Extreme Self Care

2008-07-26T23:19:00.000-07:00

The Clutter! Energy! Sex! Summer Coaching group had a great call with Dr. Lynda Johnson this week. We learned about creating reserves in the places we are depleted. One way to build reserves is by practicing Extreme Self Care - giving yourself a treat you might consider a luxury. Things like weekly manicures or massages, long hot baths - ALONE, no kids allowed in the bathroom! Time to exercise, meditate, read a good book. In short, whatever relaxes, rejuvenates, and feeds your soul.

Since I am the Queen of Self Care, I do not consider these things luxuries, but rather necessities. And you should too. You work hard, people depend on you, and your energy and attitude determine the tone of your home. Are you taking care of yourself? If not, what stands in your way? No time? Do those things seem frivolous, selfish, or overly indulgent? Share your thoughts. If your answer is yes, let us know what your favorite self care activity is.

Going it Alone, Together

2008-06-19T11:24:00.001-07:00

Do you and your partner often feel like you are single parents, ships passing in the night? Read more (after Friday when it is posted on the website) or e-mail beth.madigan@cox.net and I will send you this weeks Mothering MOMent. Let us know what you are thinking, how you make it work, the ways it doesn't, how we can support you.

Clutter! Energy! Sex!

2008-06-16T12:53:00.000-07:00

The Clutter! Energy! Sex! Summer Coaching Program is underway! Watch this spot for all the lightening, enlightening happenings!

TAKE BACK CONTROL

2008-06-11T20:49:00.000-07:00

Do you feel yourself on a slippery slope with discipline, structure, playtime, and free time? You're not alone and you can take back control. Read more and come back and post your thoughts and experiences.

I Can Do It In 6

2008-06-10T20:38:00.000-07:00

I have been tagged by Jaysi, who was tagged by Shannon, to write a 6 word meme for my life. Very interesting. The idea was prompted by the book by Larry Smith and Rachel Freshleiser, Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure. It's a compilation based on the story that Hemingway once bet that he could sum up his life in 6 words. His words were For Sale:Baby shoes, never worn. Aren't you curious about the meaning of that? Me too. Here are the rules:
1. Write your own 6 word memoir.
2. Post it on your blog
3. Link to the person that tagged you and to this original post so we can track it as it travels across the blogosphere.
4. Tag more blogs with links
5. Don't forget to leave a note on the tagged blog with an invitation to play

My 6 Word Meme:
SPEAK TRUTH, LOVE, POWER. EXTEND GRACE.

My meme is taken from my life purpose statement. I debated about the last two words - build relationship was the other choice. I decided that if there is no grace, you cannot build strong relationship. Grace comes first.
I tag Lanette and Shaina

SUMMER COACHING PROGRAM!

2008-06-05T22:50:00.000-07:00

Come join us for a three month program of clearing out, powering up, and getting it on!
You will meet experts in wellness and relationships on our calls. Calls will be recorded so you can listen again, or for the first time if you miss us live.
You DON’T want to miss this!

JUNKY JUNE We will spend this month exploring and excavating the things that drain
us – the people, places, and things that suck us dry.
You will get:
- Article on de-cluttering
- Exercise to discover and begin to eliminate Energy Drainers
- Two private e-mail responses during the month to your questions, challenges, Aha moments! – from me.
- LIVE and NOW de- cluttering! Thursday June 19 from 6:00-8:30 pm (pacific time) we will meet via telephone bridge line and all work at the same time on some personal clutter. We will have check-ins as we go and a debrief at the end of the call. It will be FUN and PRODUCTIVE!
- A follow-up exercise to help you keep the MOMENTUM going!

JULY JEWELS This month it’s all about YOU! What do you need to create the
JEWELS of wellness, solitude, and exercise in your life?
You will get:
- Article on wellness and energy from Dr. Lynda Johnson
- Exercises and suggestions to lift and energize you
- One hour Teleconference with guest expert Dr. Lynda Johnson on Thursday July 24 at 5:30pm (pacific). She is a clinical wellness psychologist and coach. I will be picking her brain about how to maximize our health and well-being! You will have a chance to ask your burning questions. Amazing Learning!
- Two private e-mail responses during the month to your questions, challenges, Aha moments! – from me or Dr. Lynda Johnson

HOT
AUGUST NIGHTS! Now it’s time to invest in your romantic relationship. This month
is about putting some SIZZLE in the FIZZLE!
You will get:
- Article on Sex
- Exercises and suggestions to spice up your relationship
- A one hour Teleconference on August 21 at 5:30 pm (pacific) with Dr. Ron Craker on communication skills and fair fighting. Bring your MAN (if you wish) .You will have the opportunity to send questions to me and Dr. Ron ahead of time or during the call
- Two private e-mail responses during the month to your questions, challenges, Aha moments! – from me or our guest expert

I promised you this would be amazing and affordable – but this is CRAZY! You get all this for $49.00! Remember, this is just because you are the BETA group. This price will not be repeated! Secure your place TODAY! Click here to register. To ensure that you get my full attention, the program is limited to the first 30 participants. Call 602.626.8036 or e-mail beth.madigan@cox.net with questions. Come! Give yourself this gift and access the wisdom of the entire group. Get some loving, encouraging accountability.
Make things HAPPEN!

Wednesday Wisdom

2008-06-03T17:14:00.000-07:00

Statistics from World Challenge...

6,571,497,332 people now live on the earth

1,200,000,000 people live on 23 cents a day

2,000,000,000 people have no electricity

80% of all people live in substandard housing

1,000,000,000 people are without safe drinking water

Every 16 seconds someone dies of hunger

57,000,000 people died in 2006

10,500,000 of those were children under 5 y.o.

14,000,000 children were orphaned because of HIV/AIDS

2,000,000 children have died as the result of armed conflict during the last 10 years

Clutter! Energy! Sex!

2008-05-30T19:06:00.000-07:00

A few months ago Dr. Ron and I surveyed 384 of you about all the ways your life has changed since you became a mother. Your heart is pouring so much of yourself into your children, that in other parts of your life you are running on empty. You let us know that clutter, lack of energy due to sleep deprivation, too little "me" time, and sporadic exercise, and a less than robust sex life are issues that concern you.

There is a natural progression in these three areas don't you think? If your environment is cluttered and disorganized you become scattered and lethargic within, making it pretty tough to exercise, meditate, or any of the things that energize you. I know this first hand. Last week I had a session with my own coach about this very thing. My office had become a literal quagmire and my head was on backwards. It was beginning to show up in my work and other places in my life. Some environmental and psychological de-clutttering put things to right again.

If you have no energy, there isn't much chance for wonderful, connected, energetic sex. I understand how this begins to feel like the hamster wheel, going round and round, not getting anywhere.
Based on the survey requests there is an exciting program of group discussions, exercises, resources, and real time outcomes forming in my head How about Junky June for de-cluttering and clearing the energy drainers in your house? Perhaps, July Jewels focused on your self care, "me time" and solitude? And finally, Hot August Nights for putting some weekly spice in your sexual and romantic life? Since you would be the Beta Group - the first ones to participate - and because Dr. Ron and I would be using your insight and feedback to grow the program, it will be VERY affordable, I promise! Would you like to make progress in the areas of clutter, energy, and sex this summer? If you are interested, send me an e-mail at beth.madigan@cox.net with "3 Free" in the subject line. I will send you more details about the fun that is planned and as a bonus I will send you articles on Clutter, Energy, and Sex. Get off the hamster wheel! Let's do something different and hugely fun and effective together this summer! There's POWER in women together

WEDNESDAY WISDOM

2008-05-27T21:57:00.000-07:00

RESENTMENT is like drinking poison and

waiting for the other person to die.

- Carrie Fisher -

WEDNESDAY WISDOM

2008-05-21T14:26:00.001-07:00

Money can't buy me...

With money you can buy a house, but not a home.

With money you can buy a clock, but not time.

With money you can buy a bed, but not sleep.

With money you can buy a book, but not knowledge.

With money you can see a doctor, but not buy health.

With money you can buy a position, but not respect.

With money you can buy blood, but not life.

With money you can buy sex, but not love.

- Chinese Proverb -

Entrainment - To Do or Undo?

2008-05-14T15:48:00.001-07:00

Entrainment is about synchronizing ourselves to other people and things in our environment. It is both good and bad for us. Read More and post your thoughts here!

Wednesday Wisdom

2008-05-14T14:21:00.001-07:00

I expect top pass through this world but once. Any good therefore, that I can do, any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now. Let me not defer it or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.

- William Penn -